When I was first introduced to instant messaging I thought it was the greatest thing since sliced bread. Imagine being able to talk to someone in another state... or country. For free! I spent hours on that sucker... then the novelty wore off. The first time I signed on I got hit with spam. I couldn't believe it. I had just opened that program up, and nearly jumped out of my skin when the fog horn from hell went off, when I got a chat request. The idea that someone would make the default sound in a program a cruise ship from hell horn should have tipped me off. Then there's the fact that some "chick" named Debbie was inviting me to check out some porn. Red flags are on the field! I received four to five before I could figure out the blocking methods. That was an even bigger omen. I download a file that I can only use under the cloak of darkness. Hmmmm. I'm not just talking one or two preferences. I had to search through almost every field to turn the appropriate ticklers off. Now I have a program that I can't use to it's potential. Great.

As I peruse through the different sections I keep seeing one thing over and over: Warnings about privacy. "Hey... Thanks for downloading our great product! By the way... we are not responsible for the bazillion spam requests and malicious users that will stop at nothing to make your life miserable. Here's some ads to pop up continuously, have a nice day!" Oh yeah, I feel warm and safe with that statement.

As I read through the security issues... both on the warning page and the open forum, I realized that the world is filled with devious little pricks. Why would you want to spam people? Has anyone ever fell for the chick with porn rouge? Hey! I just met a great gal online... She's into porn! All right! Woo hoo! High five... I don't think so.

The worst part is that if you happen to meet someone and put them on your list... They're there for life. Sure, you can take him/her off of your contact list... But you're still on theirs. Oh, too bad buckaroo. So you have to do the unspeakable. Cancel your number and get a new one. Here's the real kick in the pants. Your old number? It's still listed. I'll bet you over half the ICQ numbers out there aren't even in use anymore. What kind of business keeps a database filled with useless information? Besides the Presidency that is...

On a totally unrelated note: It's been four years since some chick died from some unknown substance that she had injected into her ass to make it smooth. Some people called it murder. Some called it an accident. Me? I called it "natural selection".