I hate the heat. Seriously, I loathe it. It's so fucking hot here, and we don't have any air conditioning. We've got fans at all the windows and a big fan that we move from the den into the bedroom when we sleep. I don't care HOW high using an AC makes the electric bill go. I'd pay it just to sleep through the night and not have to drag the fan around.

"At night you can hear her bitching and moaning, scuffing her feet and scraping the fan against the ground. The room gets really warm and suddenly she appears, shrieking "I WANT YOUR FAN!"

I could happen...