I wish... I spent Saturday in the Emergency Room, after not being able to lie down. I couldn't put any pressure on my head without shooting pain. I kept expecting to see a rod pierced through my skull when I looked in the mirror. The doctor did the usual examination, then walked passed me and yanked my ear. I almost jumped out of my chair. I yelped in pain and looked back at him. He had a slight grin on his face. Bastard. He explained afterwards that he needed to do that so that he would know what kind of infection he was dealing with. No pain meant inner ear. Oh Dear G-d no that hurts pain meant outer. He told me this while standing a safe distance away. Smart move. Six years of medical school and he uses slapstick to diagnose me.

As I was leaving he mentions that I may have MRSA. Back the surgical scrubs up... That is the kind of thing that hospitals dread. He said not to worry, that it's the OTHER kind of MRSA. Oh great, I may have the poor cousin of a health problem. He couldn't diagnose me without cultures, so I'm going to wait to speak with my doctor before completely losing what's left of my self control.

To the person who emailed me with a suggestion: Thank you so much. That was very kind of you. :)