It's been so hectic at work I have had little to no time to goof off. Horrible... I know. This weekend Jake and met up with a fellow Gamerchix and new found friend. We braved the idiots in the rain to munch on sea food and chat about everything from games to life. I had a complete blast. It's so hard to find a friend who I can chat with games about and get along with on a personal level. Bonus points for Jake and her getting along too. I look forward to meeting her hubby soon.

Monday was hell day for me. It's busy, which is good. My only worry is that my coworker is going to wait until the last minute to want to be trained and I am going to be so busy I won't be able to properly train her. My reports are getting so complicated it's just silly. I've been trying to update the instructions and it's more like a treasure map. Part of me wishes I could suspend the report until I get back. Yeah, as if that's gonna happen. By the time my mini vacation arrives I'm going to be too tired to do shit.

I loathe when people start talking to me as if they are over me and can order me around. Remember that guy who told me my job duties were changing? Yeah... so he starts up again today. This time he sends me a request for a procedure. I call him and he informs me it will be 'part of my new duties'. Mind you, they haven't said shit to my boss about this. When he explains what he expects me to do he adds that it's 'clerical work' he shouldn't have to do. Meaning... that's my job. After practically biting my tongue off I told him that until it was discussed with my boss and they decided that it was an appropriate change he should continue to do this. Fucker... I messaged my boss but she was busy so I explained that it was just bullying and I'd talk to her about it when she had a moment.

On the home front we have TWO games that came in today. Brutal Legend and Uncharted 2. Seeing as it is part of Jake's birthday present he gets the honor of playing first (damn it). Ironically the games came just as I finished Crackdown so at least I'll have a new game to play. I'm still waiting for Assassin's Creed 2 to come out. THAT baby is all mine to start off with. I love being in a gamer house.

I spent the day listening to my coworker talk about her husband and the life they had together. He died three years ago today after a lengthy illness. There were smiles, tears and moments of silence where we both thought of something in our lives to talk about. It's amazing how one life can make such a difference. We live beyond ourselves. One smile leads to another, one simple gesture leads to more. My dad would give you the shirt off of his back. Many times he did. so many little things that I remember. Taking strangers out to dinner when we traveled to France. Hell, buying food for a group of teens that were kind to us on the beach. Taking in my older sister's friends and their mom when they needed a place to stay. We traveled many places, met many people and I learned so much in the short time we spent together. After talking to my coworker I mentioned how I hope to have some sort of lasting presence on someone like this. I don't need to have my name in lights. I don't need to have a library named after me. My only wish is to have someone looking back and talking about how I made a difference in their life.

My new coworker has yet to hit a smooth ride with me. It's MUCH better than before, but she still tends to think SHE makes the rules instead of it being an office where two people work and need to BOTH come to an agreement. This morning started off by some annoying resident once again walking in to grab water. This is the same one that told all the residents she was talking with 'Oh sure, the water is in there' as if my office is a break room. This started a sip N chat session that I finally had to nip in the bud. I tried to assert myself as the alpha female only to fail miserably. She left pissy and I felt guilty. Lovely. I was simply trying to get her to think of this as an office she is okay to come in and get water from, not a public water whole. When I mentioned it to my coworker she said, "Oh, I told them all they could come in and get water here. I guess I should have told you. Sorry." Yeah, that would have been nice. I explained how I had problems with people being inconsiderate in the past and she agreed it was rude. She also said she'd clear it up with the resident. I don't want to come off as some bitch, although if you give me a week I'd get an Oscar for being one.

So help me G-d, if I have to listen to ONE MORE DAY of James Blunt's You're Beautiful I'm going to scream. It's like my coworker's MP3 player is stuck on over-played shitty pop songs lately. Of course there was a break in the madness when she played some Johnny Cash. I almost breathed a sigh of relief until she started singing along... in HIS tone. *slams head into desk*

ANYWAY... I am looking forward to this weekend for the rest and next weekend because I took an extra day off. It looks as if I'm going to need it. Unfortunately Jake wasn't able to take the same day off so we're both having vacation days on different days. :/ It sucks because I was looking forward to just hanging out with him. Right now we're trying to juggle major purchases, bills and planning on the impending furlough so trips are going to be scarce. I still want to just get away together, even if it's just day trips. I really miss those. Hopefully we'll be able to take off for the holiday and do something, even if we don't get to visit his folks.

This morning my coworker asks if it's okay for her to take some time off during the holidays. Sure. No problem. She asks about what mine will be. I comment about hoping Mr. Nosy will be able available so he can do my report for me. She has been too busy to even talk to about it and I have to completely revamp the instructions with all the changes. She mentions how it would be nice for him to do hers since she is so busy. I agree and add that it would be a lot easier since she has so many more things that require a lot of time. With that she tells me she'll cc me in the email to our boss making that suggestion. I mention that I don't like to suggest it since the last time it blew up on me. I start working on a project and she decides to read off what she wrote. She basically told our boss she discussed it with me and we felt it would be better if Mr. Nosy came to do it since it would be impossible for me to do. WTF!?! I never said impossible. Hell, I just agreed that she has a lot on her plate. Suddenly I'm a co-conspirator in getting Mr. Nosy to do her job. *facepalm* I don't know WHY I even walk into these things. After choking on water she changed the wording to say 'difficult'. I still feel like my boss is going to raise her brow at this. But hey! The good part is she'll be taking time off.

This morning I rushed into my office and noticed a message on my phone. It was a voice mail from my coworker. Apparently she forgot to do something and wanted me to help her. Sure. No problem. I turned on my computer and my email popped up... with a message from my coworker. She was asking me to do the same favor for her. Okaaay. Like I said, no problem. I got up and my phone rang. Guess who it was. Yeppers... she was calling me from home to ask if I could do the same favor she asked me to do in the email and the voice mail message. Besides the fact that I didn't officially start for a few more minutes it was annoying to have someone make me feel like they had to ride my ass to do them a favor. Bah.

With all the discussions of pay reductions, furloughs and people being laid off I am trying to think of how I can buy some of the things we need for the apartment. My credit card will be paid off in a few months, which will really help ease the strain once the furlough starts. I'm itching to use it to buy the furniture but really want to wait and see how bad it's going to be. The 21 days went down to 16 for me, which is nice. With my friends still looking for jobs while others are just losing them I am just thankful I have mine and knock on wood that this economy starts to turn around soon.

Today my coworker decided it was time for some Thriller... then the 70s music started. Right now I'm listening to "To Be Real". Remember that song? Yeah, now I do too. The difference is I have to listen to the whole thing. If I have that song stuck in my head tonight I'm going to start playing really bad gangsta rap. Shit that I have to wear ear plugs for. I might even dress the part. That's right... pants that hang off my ass, Jake's boxer shorts, an over sized teeshirt and some really big gold colored necklaces that say "OY" instead of "YO".

I've decided to get my hair cut again. I let it grow for a little bit to see if I could find another style to try out. So far nothing. I like the short hairstyle but the upkeep is expensive. I'm not about to go slumming it at Super Cuts. I might as well give some scissors to one of my nieces and tell them to have at it. They'd probably do a better job.

Jake has been fighting a losing battle with a head cold lately. He's so good at eating healthy that it's got to be something really bad to knock him off his feet. That makes me nervous. If it did that to him I can only imagine how I'm going to react. Needless to say I've been trying to stay away from him. We've got so many things planned this weekend I am hoping he's able to kick it by then. *sigh*

Work has managed to pick up some speed, which is nice. Yesterday I had yet another issue with the new gal. I was talking to her about a case and she decided to jump in and start making calls. Never mind that I had it completely under control. She dials the guy's number before I can say stop and I pitched a major fit. Then she hands the phone to me. After a brief conversation I attempted to tell her that I was in control of the situation and was not in need of any help. She announces it's her job. I shoot back with something along the lines of "Nuh Uh!" but more professional-like. I also added that we're equal job level wise. She snaps at me that 'She doesn't think so. She's over me'. Instead of flipping out verbally (facial expression-wise I was beyond that) I emailed a friend who is over her for advice. Instead of responding to me I am assuming she sent her an email directly. I get back from a break only to hear her say, "I owe you an apology." I responded with a chipper, "Oh really?" only to hear her explain that an email magically arrived from a meeting she had a week ago that clarified she and I were equal. We both have separate duties and ne'er the two shall meet... unless she needs help or visa versa. I wanted to do an "IN YOUR FACE" dance, complete with pointing and a really loud manly yell. Instead I smiled and said that I was glad THAT was cleared up and she added that now we could get back to doing work. I feel bad for her to a point. She was thrown into a position that she didn't want with next to no real explanation of what her duties were. She said that the fifteen minute conversation she had with our boss the day she arrived was the most she had heard. She also complained that she was never given a job description. I agreed that it was a shitty situation all around but that I was very comfortable working with her (youseewhatIdidthere?) and that we were going to work very well together. Then I lowered my head below the monitor screen and snickered quietly to myself.

*slams head on desk* Honest to G-d, the HELP Desk where I work is nothing short of an exercise in futility. I try to sign onto a program only to get an ACCESS REVOKED message slapped into my face. After two tries I email the Support people. Ten minutes later I get antsy and try it again. That's when I notice a phone number on the side. Oh rapture... I can call. Yeah, that was short lived. The woman that answers is nothing short of bored and not interested in helping me. I explain the situation and she says:

Twit: Okay, open Outlook.
Me: Okay... It's open.
Twit: Ummm. Click on the button that you use if you want to start a new email.
Me: O...okay.
Twit: Now start a new email.
Me: *shoves fist into mouth to keep from screaming* Done.
Twit: Okay, now type out (gives email address)
Me: Wait. This is the email address I said that I sent it to originally.
Twit: Oh. Then you did the correct thing. Now you wait.
Me: Alrighty then. *grumbles*

Why have a number to a help desk that offers NO help? I hung up and asked my friend if I really sounded THAT stupid that I didn't know how to actually start a new email. She laughed. I'm just going to assume that's because it's not true. :p

I guess the person who flipped a switch on me yesterday crapped out whatever was up their butt. All is well. Oy... Then there's Mr. Nosy. He lied to me about not being able to pick something up and made me look bad (and the person very unhappy) when I called for an update. Now the person is annoyed at him (thank goodness) and I am off the hook. I was beyond pissed when they told me about what he said but bit my tongue. There's no need to drag work shit out to other departments. I DID send an email to follow up on our conversation and CCd him. They replied with a thanks for following up and I believe got their point across. Every time I try to find something redeeming about this guy he goes and pulls some bullshit that makes me pissed all over again. The worst part is that he's not a stupid guy. Just lazy. Ah well, at least I won this round.

In December Mr. Nosy was supposed to order extra room keys for my office. I made the mistake of leaving it in his hands. Late January they finally arrive and were the wrong keys. Numbnuts didn't give them the correct number. Since he has to order them I bit my tongue and left it to him. In February he said they were finally reordered. That's the last time he checked up on it. Fast forward to yesterday when he says he wants to use my key so he won't have to have security let him in every day (which is NO big deal since I had to do it before). Anyway... I call up this woman and he hasn't checked back with her since February so nothing's been done. I was just floored. Now I take over and get the keys ordered the same day. Unfortunately they won't be ready until Monday and he doesn't want to ask for security to do it for ONE day. It's just beyond me... but whatever. Now I have to wait for his ass when I get back so I can get in. He kept saying he gets here around 7:45am. Every time I saw him it was after 8am. *grumbles* I just hate giving my keys up. This wouldn't have even been an issue if he would have FOLLOWED UP ON IT. Lazy cow.

On to better news... I'm taking a week off. YAY. Tomorrow Jake and I will be driving up the coast and having a blast. See ya!

There is no way Mr. Nosy is going to have my butt in a sling for not having time to learn my duties. He hinted that he 'couldn't find' his notes and would I be able to write up some instructions for him. Sure thing, sparky. Seven pages later I let him know they were ready to go. Our boss suggested he come by to practice a few times. I said no problem but he could also practice from the other location with the instructions. She thought it was a great idea and I left it at that. It's now less than three days before I am to leave for my vacation and he hasn't said a word. I figured he'd pull this stunt so he could say he wasn't properly trained and couldn't do all the work. Fuck that noise. Enter my nimble Ninja skills... or something like that. Today I shot off a pleasant email with all the instructions attached to him so he could go over them, CCing my boss. As her response hit my inbox with "Mr. Nosy, have you gone over to do the census" my phone was ringing. Surprise, surprise... Mr. Nosy was asking when I did the census next. I bit my tongue and didn't mention that it was IN THE INSTRUCTIONS and said, "Ipm". He sent off a reply saying he was going to be doing it with me today at 1pm. Yeah... and then he can start reading up on all the other things that I tacked on there and sweat it for the next two days. After that... I will NOT be answering my phone. If he fucks up my job it's all on him. That's all I care about. *looks at clock* Aaaaand he's late. Figures. Guess who's starting without him. You betcha.

If I clenched my jaw any tighter my teeth would shatter. Mr. Nosy just HAD to jump in and now Giddy was sent home. Giddy's doctor responded to an email that she sent explaining a specific ailment that made her uncomfortable. The doctor said that the only way she'd be relieved was to stop working and do bed rest for half a day. She wanted to talk to him about it on Friday and see if she could get a note to work part time for the last week since she doesn't have the money to stop work right now. Mr. Nosy has her forward the email, tells HR that she needs to stop working or is trying to work part time and now she's on her way home. I couldn't even say anything to him I was so pissed. I simply told her (in front of him) that she should not have given him the email until she clarified what she wanted to do with the doctor. It was his final decision to make... and not Mr. Nosy's interpretation of a personal email her doctor sent her. It isn't even an official note!

Now I'm going to be stuck in my office with this moron for the next few months. She had one more week to go... fucker. She also doesn't have the sick time or the money to be taking off. I am beyond pissed at his pushy behavior. I just hate that this is the guy who relieves me so I have to try and be civil to him. Not today. Today I am super bitch.

I called my boss to clarify what the fuck Mr. Nosy's job was in regards to mine and my friend's. I'm so glad that I did. I've been fighting to urge to do so just to try and keep on everyone's good side. I didn't want my boss to think I wasn't a team player and was hoping that he'd mellow out. After he made the statement about me being under my boss and Giddy being under him I new it was time to find out what was up. If he WAS over her, did this mean I was going to be out of a job, etc... After we talked I felt so much better. It seems as if Mr. Nosy is just too zealous and not over shit. She clarified that we are under her, that Giddy's job will be expanding and that all is well in our office. Meanwhile Mr. Nosy was trying to find out why I was in the office with the door closed and who I was talking to. He tried drilling Giddy for information and all she did is shrug. I figured it was best if I left that shit up to my boss so I opened the door and didn't comment on who I was talking to. In the end Mr. Nosy isn't a bad guy... just trying to find his space. While I totally sympathize with his situation he's going to have to look elsewhere. This office is mine, bitch.

Oh yes there was butthurt. Serious butthurt. Yesterday I had had enough of Mr. Nosy butting into my office training and trying to dictate what happens. Ever since my friend ( we'll call her Giddy) arrived he has been trying to be the main trainer and trying to take over the whole process. The hardest part is that there are only two computers. Instead of him allowing her to use it he sits there and makes her sit off to the side. While I didn't mind at first (she was watching me and being trained) it's become a major annoyance. I've been hinting at him about the job he was there to 'create'. He hasn't done shit and it looks as if the duties will be merged into ours and no third person. That's just fine. I have no problem with that. Now he just needs to push to make a decision so we can move on... without him.

Yesterday I finally told him he needed to log off so Giddy could sign on and start working. He decided that it meant he was to pull another chair and coach her on what to do. After a few minutes of this I said, "Mr Nosy, I want her to do this on her own. She won't learn with you telling her. She can ask me questions." He backed off but still sat there. Later on she decided to type her notes out. After watching her and telling her incorrect stuff I started correcting him. Again, he backed off. Then he let her be only to come back and start being nosy. I snapped.

Mr. Nosy: "So... how are those notes coming along?"
Me: "Why? Are you going to ask her for a copy? It's just her personal notes." I also scoffed. Bad form, I know. But I'm fed up.
Mr. Nosy: "No, I'm just being managerial."
Me: "You don't have to. That's what I'm here for."
Mr. Nosy: "I'm not stepping on your toes."
Me: "Yes. Yes, you are. Look. I totally have a heel print on them."

With that I turned and continued my phone call, leaving him standing there. I don't think he's a bad guy... I just don't like that he thinks he can assume duties by simply being in the office. His role in my office is to create a new position or see if it's needed. That's it. My office is run by me and my boss thinks I'm doing a fine job. I shouldn't have to tell someone that just because they're in an office doesn't mean they can start ordering people around. He soooo needs to go. At least I am finally speaking my mind. I am hoping he wants to continue the conversation so I can really lay it down. I honestly don't think he realizes how much of a pain he is. I'm just the person to let him know too.

I just got back from the oral surgeon and I look like Carly Simon. If my lip extended anymore I could use it as a cup holder. The procedure took about an hour and a half, complete with mystery 'bright green something' that is going to the pathologist. Mr. Nosy, who loves to talk out of his ass, claimed I would get 'a few stitches that dissolved'. Yeah... Seven NON dissolvable stitches later I am now going to have to go back to get them removed. The surgery went well... except for when the numbing medication started to wear off while he was working on the tooth. That and when I had to pee and they decided it was a good time to squirt water all over the place every ten seconds. I don't know what pain was worse... feeling the root of my tooth being worked on for a moment or having to pee so bad I thought my bladder would burst while water was being 'spritzed' across my face every ten seconds.

The surgeon said that he thinks this 'might' do the trick, even though he didn't find particles or something that would explain why the other treatments didn't help. He then described the puss as something that probably 'evolved' and was self sufficient so the cleanings didn't help. Oh great... I just caused a mass murder of lower life forms evolving in my mouth. That will rock me to sleep tonight. Then again... the Vicodin G-ds should help with that area.

My boss called me last night to let me know there was going to be some reorganizing in my office. I needed to get rid of the big desk she asked me to get and then get two other desks. As a last minute afterthought she said "Oh and keep the little desk for hotelling for when Mr. Nosy or I need a spot to go". After biting half my tongue off I said okay. I spoke with my friend who was just hired and she's pretty easy going about it. She also knows how annoyed I am about Mr. Nosy being there and isn't too thrilled with him either. Apparently he knows even LESS about what he's supposed to be doing than I lets on. He tried training her one day and she had to show him things. Oy.

It's been so hectic lately I haven't had time to blog as much and it really bothers me. I always feel better after letting it out... and there has been so much going on that I really need to get out. Hopefully we can get the new desks in quickly so everyone can have a spot and then my friend can work.

yeah so... I still have the tooth abscess and have to have surgery. It's the last resort before they have to pull the tooth and then put in some sort of bridge or something. To say that I'm nervous is an understatement. Between that and the whole 'you're going to be mighty sore for a few days' speech I am NOT looking forward to the 15th. I took the 16th off so that I could rest up.

My friend started work this week and so far it's been a blast. The only issue is that they neglected to tell her that they are changing her hours and she's not happy. I think she was trying to suggest I do the later shift... which is a no go. I worked too hard for too many years to have to do that shit. And with Jake going back to school it will be the only time we may have together. I'm just happy that she's here and that Mr. Nosy will soon be out of my hair. He's been especially bitchy lately and I am not amused.

We FINALLY got back online Friday night so I spent the weekend playing catchup with all the websites I frequent. It was nice but by Sunday I was climbing the walls. I really need to get out and go somewhere. There had better be a day trip in the works soon... hopefully set up by Jake.

This shit is so childish it's disgusting. I'm too lazy to look back so this may be a recap. About a month ago I had a doctor (we'll call him Dr. Dickface) come in asking about the new admitting process. I explained to him that an admission form should be filled out and sent to me. I would then give it to the correct people and follow up with the admission. This seemed to make him explode. He wanted to give me a sticky note with a patient's last name and ID number. No diagnosis. No treatment plan. No bed assignment (floor/monitored/ICU) and expect me to just guess as to why the patient is being admitted. When I attempted to ask him questions he stormed out saying he'd do it himself. Fine. Whatever. Later on I spoke with the senior doctor(we'll call him Dr. Cool) and explained the situation. We talked about it some more and it was agreed that as long as he verbally gave me the info I would write it down. Dr. Dickface has yet to say a word to me, even if we are standing next to each other. Last night I wished him a good night and he didn't say shit back. I shook my head and kept walking. Today I get a call from a doctor about a patient he is admitting through Dr. Dickface who is not thrilled that I don't have any info on him. Then I get a call from admissions about the patient. Apparently Dr. Dickface called them directly and when he was told to go through me he pitched a fit and said he didn't have time. They took the info and then forwarded it to me. From there I had to resubmit it. After doing double work that wasted time I paged Dr. Cool and bitched about Dr. Dickface. I asked if I should discuss this with him or one of the BBs. He said he would take care of it, but I am hesitant to think he will. I also told Dr. Cool that if this were third grade this shit would have been over with in two weeks. At this point I may just go to one of the BBs. Especially since he is hampering the relationship I am trying to create with the different areas. All that education... and not one ounce of maturity to show for it.

Oy joy. Oh rapture. There's nothing like someone being a total bitch to me when I have PMS and zero tolerance for said bitchiness. Take Mr. Nosy (please!). He walks in from a meeting an hour and a half later than he said he was supposed to and gets all snotty when I tell him that there are three faxes for him to do. Three. That's it. He has an hour to work and decides that it's not enough time. Meanwhile he's ready to open the email and chat. When I attempt to clarify his statement that he isn't going to do anything without a phone call he gets pissy and says that I should go down there and do it. He can kiss my ass. I was already told I would practically be living at my desk and have been. So wash my hands of it and page the doctor to clarify which patient he's sending us so I can forward the fax to the doctors. I figure he'll question that and I can let him talk to Mr. Nosy. The two of them need to work it out and not involve me. This was supposed to be a separate job entirely. As in not my problem. So far he's done everything but dump the shit in my lap. I can't wait for him to leave.

Guess who I got addicted to Facebook? Yeppers, Mr. Nosy himself. Now he's spending the day chatting with childhood friends instead of peeking over my shoulder and getting into my business. While I am still uber careful around him it's nice to be able to joke around and even the playing field. Now he's uploading pictures, chatting with friends and generally doing anything besides work. Works for me!

Part of the reason that my boss said II was hired was because of my problem solving capabilities. So now that I've been actually doing my job for a while I see quite a few areas that can be fixed. Here's where I hit the wall. So far I'm being treated as if they don't want me to fix them. You know... like I'm too aggressive. Over and over I keep hearing about how this department has always been this way. They brush off incompetency as if it's just part of the territory. Instead of recognizing the issues and fixing them they simply try to find someone else to do them. yeah, that makes people really want to excel. If the attitude is 'if you don't want to do it act stupid and they'll give it to someone else' then who could blame some lazy person for falling in line with the rest of the underachievers? Okay, I still can... but that seems to be a party of one right now. Whenever I talk about fixing issues my boss thinks that I'm doing this because I don't want to work. No... It's because the system can work more efficiently. All it takes is someone who is willing to take some heat and break some balls. Someone not willing to do their job? Write their asses out of the position and find someone that will. Someone want to get meets/exceeds on their evaluation? Tell them this is something they will be evaluated on. When you put it in terms of someone's job or someone's raise you can bet dollars to donuts they'd learn the new protocol.

Yesterday a doctor calls and asks for what the new protocol is. I tell her and she flies off of the handle. She didn't even give me a chance. It wasn't going to work. This is too many steps. I don't have support. Whine whine whine. Then she says she's taking it over my head. Fine. She asks who she should go to and I tell her my Big Boss... which also happens to be her boss. After she took this down I helped her patient. Then I get a call from her immediate boss. After going through the same routine (albeit a much nicer tone) he finally says they don't want to use the service. Okayfine... the issue isn't me, it's too many steps. They want to cut out the middle man (me). So basically he says my job is a waste of time and he'll be contacting my big boss. I shoot off an email to let him know and he calls me later on. He says that he agrees that they can go on their own... but he has no jurisdiction over the department that is no longer taking their info. That's between the two of them. I wait for a call the next day. And wait... and wait. The only thing I hear is when Mr. Nosy calls to check on me and says our boss is there. She shouts out, "Everything's fine. Disaster averted. I'll talk to you later." GAH! It's 4pm and I have yet to hear what the 'averted' ended up being. SOMETHING had to have been agreed upon to make them use me. The funny part is the same doctor had to call me today for another admission. She was snotty to me and I ignored it. I also got her a bed within record time. Eat shit, bitch.

I am so angry right now. I was so proud of our country Tuesday night. We made progress in leaps and bounds. I went to bed feeling as if this country FINALLY was ready to join the world again. Then I woke up to Prop 8 being passed and my dear friend being crushed because his marriage may be invalid. Two people who love each other and just want to live like anyone else. What is so wrong with that?

Mr. Nosy is also Mr. Fuckhead. We had a heated debate about Prop 8 yesterday. He's gay and is against gay marriage. The reason? There will be an influx of divorces. What kind of fucked up logic is that? I don't know why I expected anything else. This is the same guy who thinks that things were better when gays weren't as accepted. It made life "more edgy". Oh sure. People were beaten and killed because of their sexual preference but HE thinks it was great because he got to fuck someone while feeling naughty. Oh, and gay men adopting? Forget it. To him it's just wrong. Lesbians are A-OK, for some reason. This is a guy who grew up in a small town in Kansas. Instead of learning from the hatred and bigotry that he was forced to endure he allowed it to rub off on him. For someone who grew up in Southern California that was raised to be color blind this is a big challenge. Right now I'm losing the battle of being the bigger person. I could totally take him though...

I met with a doctor today that wanted to 'brainstorm' over how to fix some issues that they are having. Her clinic keeps forgetting to put information in that is needed in order for me to process the admission. Her big solution? I do it. That's right... have me do their work. Instead of accepting that it's a training issue they want to dump the responsibility of filling out whatever is missing on me. Never mind that the information is at the clinic's fingertips. Never mind that the responsibility is SUPPOSED to be on the clinic to fill out the necessary information so that I can send it off completed. This is from the top down, not me. So after an hour of politely telling her to fuck off and get her clinic to do it she left stating that she was 'enlightened'. Oh I'm sure. By 'enlightened' she means she's going to go to her boss to try and get me to do it. I love my job, I really do. I'm just waiting til it gets busier so I can easily say the responsibility falls back on the clinic and they need to be trained. Right now it's slow enough to where it would seem like I'm nitpicking. I hate that even though I am totally in the right I have to dodge bullets because of the pace of the workload. The best part of the day? No Mr. Nosy. He's off until Tuesday. Woooooooo!

My boss came by and tried to give Mr. Nosy some work to do. Talk about lazy! He has been sitting in this office for over a week and not lifting a fucking finger to do anything except surf the net and actually had the nerve to ask her if she needed it right away. My jaw dropped. She was more pleasant than I would have been under the same circumstances. After doing diddly squat for over four hours he finally turns to me and asks if I remember exactly what our boss told him to do. I was in shock. I smiled and simply said that I wasn't listening that closely since she was talking to him. Inside I wanted to scream. I want him out of this office so bad I am tempted to ask her. I probably won't just to keep the peace... but the itch is there.

In other fabulous news an old coworker of mine was just hired to be my assistant. Rock on! They still have to do the background check, etc... but it's pretty much in the bag. It's been so long since I've seen them... it will be nice. Plus, I think I'll totally rock as a supervisor. Just do your job and everything will be just fine. *looks at time* W000t! time to go to the movies!

Oh G-d. These interviews are going to kill me. I feel like Murphy Brown and these applicants are the quirky assistants that she couldn't stand. Today's applicant showed up at the door wearing a pink sleeveless shirt, short skirt and sunglasses on the top of her head. Her hair... oh my. There were about three inches of root before the bright pink hit, which was not brushed and shoulder length. Her tongue was pink. Her face had piercings... all over. She topped it off with a thick Hannah Montana pen. Petty? Maybe. But who brings a big pen with a Disney character on it to an interview?

This interview was the polar opposite of the first one. She started off by apologizing because she had just had her braces tightened and wouldn't be able to talk much. HAH! By the end I had visions of large objects falling on her just to shut her up. She then spoke about her four kids and how she'd need to take off for them, etc... Each question she answered lasted ten minutes, complete with wild gestures and a constant clicking of her extra long nails. At one point she started talking about one job at the VA. Mr. Snoopy asked her about that and she got real emotional, going on about how badly they are treated, that they died so we have our freedoms (even though she was treated living people) and starting crying. That's right.... crying. In an interview. Awkwaaaard. Every question Mr. Snoopy asked made me want to smash his face in. I had had enough 15 minutes into the 45 minute interview. My phone rang and I literally flew out of my chair to get it. I didn't even care how obvious it looked. It was my boss. A few minutes of chit chat (that I was happy to drag out) and she asked me about the day. I mentioned that we were conducting an interview, then whispered "Thank......you" into the phone. She burst out laughing. We chatted some more before I had to slowly make my way back into hell. By this time Miss Motor Mouth was telling Mr. Snoopy how she preferred working alone. She then went on to talk about how she hated working with other people and how they tend to get into her business. Ten minutes later I was trying to wrap it up without wrapping a chair around her neck. Seriously... this woman brought up major violent impulses. After she left we went back to my office and just stared at each other, enjoying the momentary quiet. Then the laughter started. I don't care how bad it sounds. I laughed my ass off. She was sweet, nice and had a great personality. There's no way in hell she was going to work with me.

Yesterday I had to kick some butt with one of the departments. Apparently they didn't get the memo (HURR HURR) regarding the changing in protocol when it came to my department. Instead of ONE email I had to deal with six. This is the second day in a row that I've had to answer the exact same questions. Not one person wanted to talk to me on the phone. Nor did they ask for clarification when it came down to me telling them shit has changed. A twenty minute process took four hours and the patient went elsewhere. I was not amused. Ironically this department is handled by the same twit that cock blocked me from the start, telling me that my job was redundant and unnecessary. After paging the manager I waited two minutes... then sent a reply CCing the Big Wig over the hospital. She sent an email feigning knowledge that the process was finalized. I big my tongue and let the BBs handle it. Today emails are flying and all I want to know is what needs to be done so that I can get a patient in quickly.

Mr. Snoopy is finally letting me take charge (after I corrected him on a few things). He started calling himself my manager (NO) and that he was managing my department (HELL NO). Yesterday we interviewed a twit and afterward he started saying he liked her. *blink* I walked into the interview and he had just asked er a question. Her response was, "Oh gosh... Iiiii.... I dunno." I almost choked. Fifteen minutes later I was practically throwing them both out the window. Her HUGE projects consisted of stocking six doctors examination rooms and keeping a schedule. For ONE doctor. She was fresh out of high school, answered questions with one to two word responses and sat there with a blank expression on her face when we asked for references. After verbally snapping my fingers in front of her face she said she had one. Her High School math teacher. She even had his number on her cell phone (enter the mental snickering to the tune of Police's song). We thanked her and then retreated for a pow wow. After his 'I like her' bit I weighed in with my comments. She's unable to form answers or express any responses other than "Gosh, I dunno". Her insurance knowledge consisted of copying insurance cards and faxing them to billing. Her medical terminology after six years was 'That really huge needle that goes into your heart' and 'that thing you tape on the wall in case someone faints'. After pointing out the obvious he agreed that she wasn't for us. Thank fucking G-d.

Today our applicant called late (not a good sign) and then we had to cancel. We moved it to next week which is good, since the person I have in mind can't come in before the 3rd. We have another interview this afternoon, which should be interesting. I just hope this person knows how to form a complete fucking sentence.

And the crowd goes wild. My first admission was today. So of course it was an out of ordinary one... and of course all the information wasn't entered. And yeah, the nosy guy (Mr. Snoopy) decided that he's going to start making rules. After he looked up the missing information we both fumbled about exactly what needed to be done. He agreed that calling my boss would be the best thing to do. WRONG! She was in a meeting and a tad (READ: majorly) stressed. She snapped at me (still nothing compared to the old boss but still...) and shot off some comment about hoping I wouldn't be contacting her about all the patients. Then she said I should be asking Mr. Snoopy for help. I informed her that I had and he agreed that contacting her was best. After getting off the phone I was sooo not happy. I pitched a mini fit (not cool) and tears ran (even more not cool) before regrouping and getting the information needed. A few minutes later my boss called back apologetic. That made me feel a lot better. I totally understand being stressed out. It's just nice that she was able to admit it and actually apologize. She did this three more times. You'd think she was Jewish with the amount of guilt she had... and really it was nothing. I was more annoyed that I was expected to do the first tough one without any help... and then when I followed protocol it turned out no one else new about the new rules. Yay. In the end the patient was taken care of, I set some boundaries with Mr. Snoopy regarding my job and understood the issues that we have to work on. Now if I can only get him to stop looking over my shoulder.

So the guy who I am training that seems to have an issue taking notes (he claims his writing is too sloppy, etc...) gave our boss the impression I didn't correctly train him because I didn't stand over him and tell him what to do. He is in a MUCH higher position than I am, so this is just bullshit. She came in grumpy (still nothing compared to my old boss) telling me he won't learn unless he does it. WTF!?! He's been doing it. Although he got bitchy when I told him he had to look up the doctors himself instead of shouting out to me to see if they were ours. Anyway, now I have to stand over him while he does it like a little kid. What a joke.

The final meeting regarding my position is tomorrow. That means next week it should get busy. I'm excited and nervous at the same time. I've waited so long to do this, and now I have to make sure everything goes right. They'll be eyes standing over me to see that there aren't mistakes and eyes hoping there will be. *sharpens pencils* To the latter I say back off... I've got great aim.

This morning was fun. Again... My OB (old boss) was in rare form, jumping down everyone's throat and freaking out about stupid shit. Then we met (again) about my duties. This time she pulled another staff member in to give the news of what duties they would be taking over. After the usual list she started talking about how everyone needs to learn more Excel, that it will help them in their career, blah blah blah... Whatever. Then she added, "When Odessa started she didn't know anything." Uhh.... Excuse me? WTF!?! While I wasn't the Master Chart Maker or Quick Draw McFormulas... I DID know Excel. I corrected her and she back stepped... adding how much more I've learned. Cow... Anyway, the person taking over mentioned to me about how she should get a raise for 'taking over all my duties'. Because I'm leaving and don't give a fuck I snapped back, "All of them? Please. You're not even getting a portion. But if you feel that way then by all means... ask for one." That shut her up. Considering most of the duties she got are really something she should have been doing from the start... yeah, no tears from this cubicle.

Our new temp has this... laugh. At first I couldn't place it. I know it was slightly annoying and slightly creepy. But it was also familiar. Friday morning it hit me. Duran Duran's Nowhere Girl. There's creepy forced laughter in the beginning of the song. It's EXACTLY how she sounds. I keep waiting for the echo and the bad hairdo to cue in after each breath. I don't think the laugh would bother me as much if it didn't sound so... forced. I understand that trying to fit in when you're a temp is tough, but fake laughter seems to push people away. Every time she laughs I can see 'Oh G-d, make her stop' expressions on the faces of my coworkers. I could be evil and tell her a really, really obnoxious joke and then leave the office... but I don't want to spend the last days at my job picking Temp flesh off of my desk. Not to mention I would totally lose any chance of a going away party. Fuck that shit. I'll have my party yet. *flips off lazy coworker*

So one of my coworkers wants to apply for my position. She's a good worker... when she wants to be. But *most* of the time she talks to her family members either on the phone or when they stop by her desk and chat for twenty minutes. She's also the one that is easily swayed with gossip and bullies other employees. All those are doable... considering my boss would ride her like a Stallion and break her into a pony. The part that *really* bugs the shit out of me is that she has NO experience with Word, Excel, Access or PowerPoint. I've tried to show her things from time to time and she would have none of it. To be fair... none of them would. Why learn something when I could do it? The worst part is she's had to use Excel in the past. The other day she asked me about the position and I said it was report heavy. Her response, "Well you didn't know it when you started, right?" WTF!?! Why does everyone think I was a total moron when I started at my position. The *only* thing I wasn't used to doing was graphs. Even then I had done some. And when I was hired we had one or two major reports a month. Now I have a total of 32 reports to do every day. That's before I update all my weekly, monthly and quarterly reports. Then there are the reports I'm asked to do on the fly. considering she didn't know how to add a column or make a title, her learning curve is straight up. I don't mind teaching someone my duties... but I'll be damned if I'm going to teach them how to use the programs. Fuck that.

The twit, by the way, is me. After consulting with the letter G-ds (Cat and Jake) I finalized my official farewell letter and sent it off to let everyone know I was out of here. First glitch was the group email. Basically... It was wrong. After resending it the next morning Jake IMs me about the email forward I left. the first draft of the farewell email was a sample I found on the web. I deleted, changed and sent to Cat for review. What I didn't realize is the email linked part of the address from the sample, which wasn't even close to my work address. After pondering the idea of getting the email address I decided to recall the email and replace with a new one. I was halfway there and accidentally clicked off of the new email. Instead of canceling the recall it simply deleted without any replacement. That meant I had to see which of the twenty to thirty people opened the email before resending. FINALLY I resent the email to everyone and the responses started flowing in. Some had already heard through the gossip vine. Others were shocked but tickled pink that I was finally getting away from my boss. All wished me well and said they'd probably still be working with me in some form or fashion. Lovely... it's like a bad penny. One coworker saw the failed recall email (I hate that it shows that) and asked if that meant I wasn't leaving. I refrained from saying, "Not very fucking likely" and simply explained it was to try and correct an email error. Whatever.

Later on in the day I was told I needed to train one of the nurses to do my daily reports. I went through and counted how many different reports I did and it ended up being twenty seven. I thought the nurse was going to faint. I have yet to write out how to do the major report... and am not looking forward to it. Try explaining how to change Excel graphs imbedded into a Word document to someone who doesn't know how to change Margins. It's one thing to show someone how to do this when they understand Word and Excel... but I'll be damned if I'm going to teach someone the basics of a program so they'll fuck up the document and blame me for not teaching them right.

Since I worked so hard (Read: forwarded to Cat and Jake) on my farewell email that I thought I'd post it here for posterity.

Hello Everyone,

As some of you may know, I will be leaving my position at the [old department] sometime in the next month. I have accepted a newly-created position with the [new job department], and I want to take this opportunity to say goodbye to each of you.

I am deeply grateful to have worked with such a warm, wonderful group of individuals. I have immensely enjoyed working here, and I appreciate having had this opportunity to work alongside you.

During the past several years, each of you has provided me with support, encouragement and guidance. As a result, I feel I have grown immensely; both personally and professionally. I have shared a unique camaraderie with each of you, which I hope will continue in the future - even if I may no longer work with you directly.

I look forward to the challenges and personal growth that will come with my future position, though I will remember my time with the [old job] fondly.

I wish you the best of luck and an abundance of success in the future.

Please feel free to reach me via email at [CORRECT email here].

Warm regards,

Odessa

In other words: Laterz! LOL!

Some days I wonder why I even come into work. Then I remember the bills.... A coworker comes up to me while I'm on the phone and says she'll come back. No problem. She pops by a while later, still on the phone. She says she'll come back. Do you see a pattern arising? She comes by AGAIN and I stop her from leaving. You know... because being on the phone isn't going to change. She announces that she's locked out of her computer and can't get in. Oy... I call the IT guy and he tells her to restart. I go back to my call. A while later she comes by to let me know she still can't get onto her computer. And by 'a while' I mean 'over an hour'. I contact the IT guy who tells her to restart and it's lather, rinse, repeat. So she comes up tell tell me that she has yet to get onto her computer and I ask her why she didn't tell me. 'You were busy'. WTF!?! I'm ALWAYS busy. I tell her to stick a note under my face if I'm on a call and she says, 'It's not that serious'. Oooookay. Cue the boss coming in late and finding out said coworker hasn't been able to sign onto her computer for two hours. Guess who's fault it is. I'll give you ONE guess. So yeah, I get the fucking riot act for not going over to her desk and standing there while she tried to sign onto her computer. The last I heard it's a password issue... otherwise known as a UE. Now I'm told the hard drive is going bad and it's still my fault that she didn't tell me she couldn't get in. Any rational person who's job solely relies on them being able to sign into the computer would raise hell if they couldn't get on. Yeah... welcome to UCLA. Home of the lazy. Meanwhile I'm working through lunch (as usual) and my boss said, "I could have kicked you out of your cubicle so she could have a spot, but I found other people." Gee, thanks. You're so kind.

This morning they had the weekly meeting with the AAs in my office. One of the coworkers who I like got verbally jumped about being slow with her duties. To be fair... she is slower than the rest. But she's also more thorough and the most pleasant to talk to. So of course I jumped in when I shouldn't have... which makes it look like I'm just sticking up for her. But whatever. Everyone offers something to their job. What the speedy demons add in speed they take away in customer service. *sigh*

So the server. Yeah... It's been choking on a big one lately. I have no idea why either. All I ask is that it not gork over the weekend so I can have an nice enjoyable weekend that doesn't involve volleying emails between my host and the people who maintain my server.

I may have big news but need to hold off sharing it. *smiles* Anyway, my birthday is tomorrow. Another year older, yet none the wiser. Yeppers, that just about sums it up!

We're the only office officially open for the Admin Holiday. This means we get all the 'I'm trying to make an appointment at the clinic but they're closed' calls. As if we can do anything but say, "Yes, they are closed. You'll have to call back on Monday." Then listen to them whine and bitch and moan about how they want to make their appointment NOW. I'm in a "Fuck off" mood, so it has not been pleasant. Meanwhile the pot luck party is in full swing and I have been keeping a VERY low profile so I'm not bombarded with comments. I couldn't pay so I'm not going to just mooch. I even had a coworker call in sick and say, "The drinks I brought are your donation. So now you can go!" I respectfully declined and felt about an inch high. Just leave me alone to my food that I brought and eat your damn pot luck! *grumbles*

I seem to have lost my train of thought. I've spent the day correcting a simple spreadsheet no less than seven times. The corrections are stupid shit that I totally should have caught. Like putting the wrong dates. THREE times. My boss finally put her head on the table and just gave up. I'm sure part of it is that I need my monthly vitamin B12. That's the thing with having my surgery. You can't slide on the vitamins. I have to do some major reports and simply don't have the ability to concentrate. Not good. Sooooo not good.

In other news we learned about a coworker that was let go with the other Britney snoopers. She was given the option of retiring or having her ass fired. She retired. I like the gal but think they should have fired her ass just like everyone else who violated HIPAA to peek into the life of someone in the entertainment business. I don't care WHAT they do for a living or what kind of person they are personally. Everyone deserves privacy. Everyone. You violate their privacy, you get shitcanned. End of story. I don't care what you are. Janitor, doctor, administrator. Same fate for the same offense. It doesn't matter what they saw, either. They still went into the records with the intent to view private documents. With the amount of emails that we received about HIPAA and the consequences for violating patient privacy anyone who went ahead and did it was a complete moron and doesn't need to be dealing with patient care.

We're supposed to have a potluck this Friday and guess who isn't joining in. Yeppers... You guessed it. Moi. With three days of no pay I am just barely making it and don't have enough to fork out for anything extra. Ironically it's supposed to be a general potluck/birthday celebration for the April birthdays (which means me). Personally I could give a rats ass about it, especially after the decision to make people bring their own cake was decided. Of course this little party was planned up by my boss since it's her 50th, which still makes the whole decision a load of crap. Everyone brings their own cake if they want to celebrate... except for mine. Yeah, real class.

I haven't even bothered to tell them. I figure when they ask I'll let them know. I'm just so done with this place lately it's beyond silly. Stupid rules, stupid peole and the person who gets the shaft has been me. Anyway, enough bitching and moaning and whining and griping. I have chocolate. Any day is a good day when there's enough chocolate around.

Here's the latest scoop on my ever dramatic life in the cubicles of hell that we call work. The lazy cow who pitched a fit about buying a cake for my friend and coworker? Yeah, she's spear heading a pot luck birthday for my boss, another coworker and yours truly. I fucking kid you not. I am beyond chaffed about this. I got the email and practically yelled out "fuck you" before deleting it. My friend intercommed me to express her extreme displeasure about this whole ordeal (IE: It fucking sucks). Personally I'd rather give them the finger and just stick to celebrating my birthday privately. I'll probably get my SARS carrying boss something since its a special birthday... maybe a rhinestone mask.

Yeah, so the lazy coworker managed to fuck up any future birthdays. They took a vote (at her insistance) and now if you want to celebrate your birthday you bring your own cake. Give me a fucking break. I always looked forward to having that done by someone. I don't have family and most of my friends aren't local. In short... It's the only time I really have a group of people sing happy birthday to me. I'll be damned if I'm going to buy a fucking cake for myself and bring it to work. That's just sad. My boss knew it was going to piss me off, so she didn't even include me in the vote. She told me as she had one foot in the other direction, ready to bolt. G-d forbid I should have a different fucking opinion. She can kiss my ass if she thinks I'm buying cake for people to eat just to get a happy birthday sung to me. And I'll be damned if I do anything for that cow that decided to bitch about the birthday celebrations.

Every day I go to break and lunch around the same time. It's rare I'm off by more than ten minutes. Every day I have someone call or come by with work related crap and they always say the same thing: "I know you're at lunch but..." There are a *few* times they pull the "Oh, you're at lunch? Anyway..." Either way I don't get to just kick back and rest in peace. Yes, I *can* go to the second floor and sit in a room that is filled with people I don't know and twittle my thumbs... or I can volley annoying calls and sit at my desk and blog. You do the math.

Today I get two calls from coworkers, one coworker that comes over and leaves when she sees my LUNCH sign up and finally a call from my boss. She starts to tell me about a problem, then attempts to rush me off of the phone by saying 'Anyway, you're at lunch we'll deal with this afterwards'. Oh sure... like that's going to sit well. Don't throw an issue partly in my lap, then snag it away and hold it over my head so I have to think about it for the rest of the hour. I FINALLY cut her off and just kept saying, "Just tell me, tell me, TELL ME." It ended up being something that the other coworker was bitching about... and it WASN'T my problem. I hate when people blame the software when it's a user issue. The report ISN'T wrong... The person running it incorrectly is. *grumbles* I even blurted out, 'It's a USER error" while said user was in the room. I didn't make any friends today, that's for sure. Fuck em if they can't do their job. Is it five yet?

Oh G-d! The mentality of my workplace just dropped below a two year old. We have two coworkers being pissy with each other and I'm the one that has to deal with it. One coughs so the other bitches. The coughing chick retaliates by bitching about the lazy one always being away from her desk. The latest installment of As the Playground Turns was this morning. We get an email from the lazy one bitching about the coughing one not doing all her work fast enough. I kid you not. Her cryptic email made my eye twitch. She spent the whole day monitoring this other person's workload... but didn't do shit to help out. My friend/coworker, who was also CC'd on the latest bitch mail, rolled her eyes and shot back asking the lazy one to clarify what her email was actually for. While part of me wants to block any bitch content from my Inbox I am curious to see how she'll spin this one. "Oh, I was just letting you know...' isn't going to fly. *grabs popcorn*.

A stool pigeon. A rat. A.. a... spyish person. My Boss finally noticed that one of my coworkers has been taking advantage of the VERY cushy job that she's been given. This is the same person that she was talking about promoting because of her excellent work. To be honest the girl CAN hustle and get things done. The problem is that it's only when she wants to. Last week my boss freaked out about the long holiday and started telling everyone to help her out and me to take messages. I balked. Why be backlogged with patient calls when two people could clear the fax out? She scoffed. She rolled her eyes. She... mocked me. WTF. Then she did her sarcastic 'FINE' (which I can do soooo much better) and told me to do it. I cleared that sucker out with time to spare. She looked at the work and conceded. I wasn't happy with that. I made her admit that I was right and that she was wrong. To my surprise she actually did. Since then she's been on a mission to make sure my coworker either stepped up or stepped aside. As frustrated as I am with the predicament I am pissed off that the coworker put me in this situation. She knows she's being watched. She KNOWS she can work harder. She KNOWS our boss can and does listen in on conversations. Yet she continues to call family and friends throughout the day and not do the work she's supposed to.

This morning she was given a relatively simple task. Clear out the inbox by 9am (before most offices open). At 9am none of them were cleared and I walked by to see her on the phone with her bank. I wanted to smack her upside the head. She was being offered a chance to be reclassified, get a raise and move up... and it's for the easiest job ever! Yet all she can do is fuck around because someone isn't sitting next to her and breathing down her throat. You know... if they're going to add 'babysitter' to my list of duties I want a fucking raise.

Work drama can be humorous. I find the petty stuff the funniest. Every day I run a dozen reports to put together a daily report of how we did the day before. It shows how many calls we answered, how many referrals we did, etc... It's supposed to be there as a sort of personal gage. Some of the coworkers use it as a weapon. It doesn't matter that each person also has other tasks which impact on calls, etc... Instead of using it to help themselves they use it to point out the problems of other people. Sibling rivalry exists everywhere. I have one coworker who watches our phone call display with a vengeance and calls me the minute she thinks she's getting the wrong amount of calls. Annoying? Yes. But at least she's keeping track. The pettiness REALLY gets stupid when they start pointing out minute details (I was on hold less time then them) without acknowledging the obvious (they were ALSO off the phones more). I *could* get snarky and point the ironies out... but I'm just not that interested in running twenty more reports to prove that this person does as much work as everyone else based on all their job duties. Instead I smile, give a surprised look and then go back to my job and thank goodness I don't have to work closer.

Honest to G-d, this lazy coworker is going to be the death of me.... or her. On Friday I reminded her that a fellow coworker's birthday was this weekend and it was her turn to buy the cake. The rule is the last person to have a birthday gets to buy the next person a cake. Simple, right? Fair, right? yeah... so anyway, this lazy cow forgets to get the cake on Monday. I ask her and she starts some song and dance about having things going on, etc... and I slapped her back with a "It's ONCE a year. They did it for you." Tuesday 4pm rolls around and TT points over her shoulder that the cake is here. What she DOESN'T tell me is she 'forgot' again and another coworker got it for her. I ask if she's going to get everyone together and she starts some bullshit about how I can do it because she's busy entering stuff. I started to, then went back to my desk. It's not my problem. 4:15pm rolls around and she asks me as I walk by. I asked if she wanted to do it the next day. She agrees then I add, "Fine. You call up AR and tell her you have the cake but we're doing it tomorrow so she knows she wasn't forgotten." She looked at me like I said, "Fine. You slice the baby up and eat it's intestines while we point and laugh at you." She even had the nerve to say "I didn't even want to be involved in this." I said, "fine, you tell The Boss you don't want to". Two minutes later I was told we were doing the cake. Mind you, that lazy cow didn't even flinch. No well wishes, no nothing.

Part of me wants to call her on it and say that she can just not be involved in any of it. But that's bullshit. We don't do much together and this is one thing we all do to share a private moment of our lives. While most places get to go out and have lunches we are stuck answering phones all day. If she can't be arsed to be a team player then she shouldn't be here. Stupid cow.

Some weeks are bad and some are really bad. Then there's this week. If I had to rate it on a scale of pain (one being an ache and ten being amputation and disembowelment by psycho killer) I'd have to rate it a 6.5. Seriously... losing a limb by Michael Myers isn't that far behind what this week has done. I've had patients from hell, incarcerated patients whose cases needed to be hand carried (with no less than 15 calls a day) and coworkers who found any and every opportunity to weasel out of their responsibilities with a simple 'I didn't know'.

Last night I even had a guy in a moving truck stalking me... for about eight miles. Everywhere I went he veered into my lane to follow. At first I thought he was just not paying attention. Then just an asshole. By the time I pulled into the grocery store parking lot I realized that he was following me. I parked and called Jake to let him know and the guy circled the huge lot... twice. There were plenty of spaces to park too. Then he seemed to disappear, but not before I called Jake again to tell him to hurry up. As we pulled out of the lot I spotted him, sitting in the van across the street, blocking traffic. He pulled out to follow but got stuck at the light. Thank goodness for slow people. Finally there was a death of a coworker's mother. I had to sit there while my boss tried to marginalize the issue. "Well, she knew it was coming". As if losing a parent to cancer VS a car accident is any less painful. Now I'm sitting here and begging for five o'clock to come so I can fly out of here and just vegetate with Cat and Mark while praying that this weekend takes forever to end.

Yesterday a coworker offered a tin of cookies to us. I politely declined, saying we were trying to be good. Now I wish I had taken the damn things. She decided to offer them to all of us, begging me to try the 'yummy cookies' her uncle bought her that she couldn't eat for health reasons. I grabbed a couple while faintly hearing another coworker whisper 'don't!' and took them to my desk. I sat down, popped in one of the cookies in my mouth and then... stopped. The taste. It was... oh man. It was like old playdough. I reached for the trashcan and spit it all out, then followed that up with the other cookies I had grabbed. In the background I could hear a faint snickering with an 'I told you so'. That bitch. :p Today I heard the group whispering about what to do with the playdough cookies. They didn't want to hurt our coworkers feelings... but didn't want to spend the next eight hours spitting up nasty treats either. I walked up and showed plan C to them. I took a handful of cookies, smiled, then dropped them into the trashcan. I figure two to three days of feeding the trash should make everyone happy. I is so smart.

Every morning I walk past a coworker on my way to fill up my water bottle who just HAS to start asking me work questions. I haven't even had my coffee and already she's found SOMETHING wrong that she has to bitch about. That SOMETHING is also somehow my responsibility to fix. G-d forbid she actually look for directions or click on something to see if it's fixable. She's one of those helpless people who doesn't know a lick of Excel but uses it anyway... and expects me to correct any errors she manages to create (and she ALWAYS does).

This morning it was about the date. She said she typed January 08 and it went back to January 07. No matter how many times she tried (my guess is two) she couldn't get the date to be 08. Usually (meaning every fucking day) I go over there and magically fix whatever issue she has. This morning I'm tired. I'm cranky. I haven't had my coffee... AND I'm PMSing.

Her: It won't change to 08
Me: Wow... *rolls eyes*
Her: No matter what I do
Me: I never heard of that
Her: I've tried it over and over
Me: Gee... that sucks. Maybe you should just type January since the report is named 2008?
Her: Nevermind (really pissy). I'LL keep trying.

Then she gives me attitude because I don't fly over there to save the day. Again. Besides it NOT being my job to be her secretary, I REALLY didn't appreciate her 'so you do it' attitude. She's been on my nerve all week with the 'Oh woe is me, I work so hard' while I pick up her slack (and the rest of the groups). I don't bitch about it. I don't whine to them. I just do it. So yeah... I got a tad annoyed when she once again expected me to fix something without asking how SHE could do it. Is this day over yet?

Demon = food. Lots of it. Everywhere. GAH! I've been munching on finger sandwiches, cookies, baked goods and everything else they've set down for us to eat all day long. It started innocently enough. we had a Tea Party to raise more money for the needy and (semi) needy families we are adopting this year. I say 'semi' because I can't call a family that's Christmas wish is for a Wii and a 19 - 20 inch TV needy. The other family has so many needs. A family of seven (Mom and dad with five children), two children severely retarded with severe medical conditions and one of those is wheelchair bound. They live in a horrible part of town and barely get by. Their requests for a ham on Christmas and a jacket for one of the boys broke my heart. They weren't asking for much... just a few necessities and a nice dinner for the holiday. Back to that later.... First, the food. Oh yes, the evil evil food. home baked goods, little sandwiches made by coworkers and freshly brewed tea was too much for me to handle. I ate. and ate. And... took a little breather, then ate again. Each portion just enough to satisfy my hunger, but more portions than I care to mention. Oy... To make matters worse (for my tummy and waistline) they brought all the extras and placed them RIGHT... BY.... MY... DESK. Kill me now.

Okay, back to why I'm so miffed about this fucking adopt a family shit. The one family truly needed our help in every sense of the word. They needed the kindness that only seems to come around this time of year. Wallets open a little more, people listen a little longer and kindness is spread a little thicker. Except when driving. Those bastards are all getting coal in their stockings. So when one family was unable to be reached our building took on a coworker who was in a bad accident and needed several surgeries. Needless to say, their Christmas wouldn't be great. I have no problem with helping out people in need. But when the wish list consisted of the Wii game console and a 19' - 20' television (for a nine year old) I balked. I grumbled. I raised hell. We went above and beyond the amount that was expected only to be told they were going to buy them the game console. WTF!?! I don't care if the kid wanted it... you don't buy a 'needy' family a $300 - $500 gift. Food, gift certificates yes. But a game console that needs games which run about $30 - $50 each? I don't fucking think so. If you can afford that, you aren't that needy. The coup de grace was finding out that not only did the second floor people buy the kid the Wii AND the television, but instead of joining us and donating the rest of the excess money to other families who weren't adopted they opted to 'take care of their own' and buy other things for their coworker. Merry Fucking Christmas...

My weird coworker says this over and over and over again. Thirty three times. Thirty three times for ONE call. By the end I wanted to slit my wrists.... or her throat. She also loves to say "Hi. hi. Hi. Hi. Hiii." My other coworker almost kissed my boss' feet when she was moved across the office (and out of WC's range). She loves to repeat. It's worse then Valley Girl chat. Over and over... and I have about five more hours of trying NOT to strangle her. Anyone want a human parrot?

This year I managed to ditch that annoying Santa fucker at work. While he ho ho ho'd around all the employees that cared I hid in the kitchen with another anti-santa person and bitched about him. We also bitched about fearing Clowns too... which was cool. I felt like he was a kindred spirit until he mentioned fearing antiques. Then it just got weird. Yeah, bah humbug to you too. Now I have all the people around me laughing about how I ditched Santa. A few said they were on the look out to warn me. It's said when it gets to the point where you have to hide just to not get into an altercation with some moron who throws on a costume and suddenly thinks he's all that. Next year I'm going to line up mini GI Joes with Santa targets around my desk.

Every time I see this one woman at work she asks me how much weight I've lost. At first it made me feel good to tell someone. After a while it got... annoying. I don't even talk to this woman outside of 'hello, how are you?' and now I add 'even more!' or 'not weighing myself'. Still... she still asks. Personally I think it's kind of rude, but it's my fault for answering her original question. it's gotten to the point to where I just walk by and don't make eye contact. I don't WANT to share how much I've lost. I don't WANT to bring a scale in to satisfy her nosy desire to watch my butt shrink. Isn't there some sort of human etiquette on what you should and should NOT ask total strangers? I think I buy her a book on How Not to be Rude* for the holiday. That or just tell her to fuck off. Hmmm.... The latter IS cheaper.

*not an actual book that I know of. Just being a sarcastic shit because it's Friday and I'm on my second cup of coffee. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

...the young caucasion girl. That's the first thing a woman who works at UCLA snapped at one of the nurses. It was also the start of a thirty minute tyrade that left two woman (both UBER nice) shaking and me steaming mad. The reason for her flipping out? A woman who called us excessively when she didn't get any call backs was also calling this bitch. So my coworker called to check if she got the paperwork. When she never got a callback my coworker called two more times to see if everything was okay, etc... So yeah... it's over this woman feeling like we're trying to make her DO HER JOB.

The next day when I learned of it I went directly to our boss' office and told her of the incident. It took me forty minutes to convince the woman who got the brunt of the verbal abuse to agree to make a complaint. By the way, she's not caucasion and a few years shy of forty. Luckily the employee's boss is on good terms with us and VERY customer service conscious. We rehashed the event via phone and managed to get quite a few gasps and shocked expressions before it was done. My boss was NOT pleased. I even used my 'we're not working in a pencil factory ya know... we're working with patients and need to be more considerate' lecture. Sure... it was preaching to the choir, but it felt good to add it.

I'm always amazed at how nasty people can be. Especially those who will tear anyone apart if they think the person is too nice to stand up for themself. Throughout the tirade this woman whined about being the only one as if she were at the helm of the Titanic and narrowly missing icebergs daily. I wish I could tell her that the person she screamed at is dealing with a mother dying of cancer. A grandfather dying of old age. A grandmother walking the halls with Alzheimers. Two jobs to try and support them all... and STILL manages to smile and be pleasant. I DID tell the manager that later on. Luckily she knows her and is sympathetic to the situation. What happens remains to be seen. Bottom line: The cow needs to be slapped. *sigh*

The drama that is my cubicle neighbor happened to get into the elevator at the same time as me today. After the initial greetings we moved on to the weekend. I kept my answer short (it was nice) while she went on about working for extra money, trying to keep the house, telling her husband he needs to step up and do some work while watching the kids, etc... She added 'You know how it is'. I wanted so bad to say, 'Actually, I don't'. Don't get me wrong, I think everyone's gone through the phase where they spent money like there was no tomorrow and then flipped out after getting the bills. I'm sure most people fought their way out of debt that they should have kept in control. Hell... I went to the Consumer Credit Counseling Service (CCCS) after spending when I shouldn't have and putting rent/tires/oil changes/etc... on my credit card. I cut up those cards and slowly paid off every dime. In the end it felt liberating. I was in my early twenties... the age of discovering reason. This woman, on the other hand, is in her thirties with children to take care of. Three to be exact. Three kids and a husband who doesn't want to help with the kids, can't seem to keep a job and generally causes that woman grief. Grief that she talks about daily. Hourly. To anyone and everyone within earshot.

I'd love to give this woman advice. It would be so easy for me to just say 'dump his ass'. Easy for me because I wouldn't have to deal with children. I wouldn't have to deal with lawyers. When Jake and I were going through tough times I sat down and looked at our home and made a mental tally of his VS mine. The hardest part would be the cats. Hard for him, that is... because they stay with me. :p

Meanwhile the woman who sits by me is stuck in a situation that there's no easy answer for. So instead of answering I give her a consoling look and slight smile... as to say 'I understand'. What I'm *really* saying is 'Dear G-d... are we at our floor yet?'.

That's what I've been saying since the one coworker started working on our fax server. She keeps kicking back records that have everything and I have be the one to look like an ass when they call to find out what's going on. I swear I'm going to start telling them she's an alcoholic just for the pity defense. Of course... it's funnier if they can see my hand movements when I tell them. Now watch... she's sleeping with Jack Daniels and I didn't even know it. :p

The Creepy IT Chick has a few more nails in her coffin. One of which is complementary of my boss. She talks loud. And cusses. And gossips. And bitches. And... she's annoying. So after a round of 'lets bitch about the boss in a job that I'm not even officially hired in' my boss had had enough. She slammed her door (not the first time) and typed out an email to her boss, politely asking for someone talk talk to her about her tone and wording. She actually had a good point. There's nothing worse than talking with a patient who's loved one is dying and trying to drown out profanities and negative comments of the person next to you. CITC admitted her volume level was high and promised to keep it down. That last for a total of three days. Monday she was back to her old self with the Creepy IT guy that hangs around her and their boss came by. She asked them how long they had been there and if she remembered that all lengthy conversations were not to be held at her desk. With that the guy skittered away and CITC was left to simmer at her desk. I could bake an egg on her forehead. Oy.

I really don't feel *that* bad for her. She's bitched about this job since I first met her. Everyone who walked by her desk would have to listen to snarky comments about her boss and whoever else she worked with that wasn't around. I felt like I was in junior high again and happened upon one of the mean girl spots. You know... the corners that all the bitchy girls hung around, cat calling to everyone else. The minute one of the teachers walked by they went into innocent mode. The biggest difference is... this chick is in her 50s/60s. It's no wonder she can't find a permanent position. Snarky ISN'T sexy. :p

One of my close friends who retired has come back to work as a temp to help us out. I love her to death... but she drives me batty at work. She always asks a million questions, seems to be a magnet for any computer issues (like I'm one to talk) and expects me to drop everything to fix her problem. Thursday morning I was not in a good mood and she was waiting for me when I arrived. I didn't even have time to flick my computer on before she was asking me to fix her latest issue. For some reason Microsoft Outlook just loves to freeze on her. Every day. Multiple times. The first five days I was patient. Now I'm ready to revoke her computer privileges. I feel bad because I adore her to death. I just wish I could adore her *outside* of work. At this rate I'm going to kill her before her assignment is over. Oy...

A woman who works in our office just came back from a mental stress leave. After three months of being off (part of which she was institutionalized) she is trying to get back into the swing of things. We talked about her being on medication and the stigma that it created... even losing friends because of it. I told her that they weren't real friends in the first place if they judge you on that. It's hard to accept that in this day and age mental illness is still so taboo. I explained to her that it's like any chemical imbalance. Diabetes, heart conditions, and other health problems can all be controlled by medication. It doesn't make the person any less of a decent human being. The nice thing was that she wanted to talk about it. She wanted people to know. She figured that way they could make their decision and she would know where they stood. I admire her for that. We had a nice conversation and she really looked happy about talking to me about it. It's one of those awkward situations where you want to tell someone... you just don't know how.

An interesting tidbit was how she spoke about her culture (she's black) disregards mental illness. She's going through horrible depression and they're telling her to pray, put her faith in G-d, etc... As if she's just not religious enough and that's her problem. Why do people rely on religion for everything? As if everything else is just a way to stick it to G-d. I told her the next time they're on death's door with a cold and have enough snot flowing to drown a cow... tell them they need to pray instead of taking that Cold medicine. Let's see how fast they backtrack on their opinion when *they're* the ones suffering. Oh, and then duck. Nyquil bottles can cause a nasty bump on the noggin when thrown... even from a weak bible thumper.

Technology is a great thing... if you have the basic understanding of the process and/or learning capabilities. We have a few people at work who view anything new as 'too hard' or 'too confusing' and manage to fuck up even the simplest of tasks. Take this one guy for instance. He shares our fax server and has managed to fuck it up no less than three times. A simple task such as sending a fax becomes a huge ordeal when he has to type in the fax number on a computer instead of pushing the buttons on a fax machine. He's also managed to use up all the server space uploading personal photos. Apparently he didn't think using it as his personal photo album was a big deal.

Then there's this twitty girl who thinks the IT guy is her personal tech support. She's driving him crazy over a personal issue while I'm driving him crazy about a work one. There was a time that I thought tech support was a decent job to look into. Now I see the darker side. The darker, dumber side. I'd be fired within a week for slapping people upside the head.

My workplace has just gotten stupid. I don't know if it's because the staff is all female or we just got unlucky with the personality types. I vote for the female issue. Most women I've known are prone to gossiping. Add a bully (or two) into the mix and you've got a recipe for headaches galore. What's worse is that all the women in my office are in their 40s and 50s. You'd think they'd grow out of this playground behavior. Instead, they seem to have almost mastered it.

"Coworker A (CA)" is a bit slow in her production. What she lacks in speed she makes up for in knowledge. "Coworker B (CB)" is fast and on the ball when it comes to her job. My boss made her lead because of that. Her problem? She can't just do her job. She's either on the phone with family members or they come by her desk to chat. This is all day long, every day. Then there's the problem employee, "Coworker C (CC)", that I bitch about from time to time. She is constantly over at the busy body's desk, gossiping. CB and CC get together and gang up on CA. The last few weeks has been beyond ridiculous... so I went to my boss. She half listened, and now has my friend trying to intervene. Meanwhile I have to sit there and listen to all the childishness while they take turns bickering about each other. I need a vacation... BIG TIME.

Working in the medical field has it's perks. It also has it's annoying parts. People want free advice. They want to know it's going to work before they even try it... even if there's no guarantee that they will have the same outcome. Try explaining that to someone looking for a miracle. so yeah... this Friday I met with a friend's niece and talked about weight loss surgery. Here's the kicker: It was at a burger joint. Their choice, not mine. Jake and I met up at Hamlet's and ended up sitting for a half hour before my friend got there. Then another thirty minutes til her niece arrived. She was nice, funny and I think would do good with the surgery. Then again, this is a non medical opinion based on one meal. The hardest part is giving her information without touching on my personal opinion of the doctors/personnel. Surgically the doctor is excellent. Personally... not so much. But that was with me. Again, same thing with the staff. How I have to deal with them is completely different, so it's not fair that I even bring that into the mix.I spoke about it with my friend beforehand and she agreed that it wasn't something to discuss. Stick to the medical questions, leave the personality part out of it.

Saturday was decent, although I checked my PMS time-frame several times after having it out with Jake. Nope, not due. He was just being an ass. He wanted to go to Cat and Mark's house to play games. He also discussed with them about getting me to join. Bad idea. See... I don't play video games. I grew up before they were everyone's passion and personally get too stressed when watching. Plus, most of the games Jake plays makes me dizzy just to follow. I feel like I'm sea sick after a few minutes. Give me something silly like the Sims 2 and I'm happy. Anyway, he told me and I suggested they come to our place so I could fuck around on my computer while they played. He started the make me feel guilty and I got pissed. REALLY pissed. It's not fair that I should have to play something just because he wants me to. If I'm not interested... then I'm not interested. It took me half the night to get over it. In the end they had fun with their games, I downloaded a ton of shit for the Sims 2 game and all was good. In between we had a good meal, interesting conversation and the night ended on a positive note around 2 a.m.

Is the weekend really over? *sigh*

Part of the area we're *loosely* connected to department wise decided to email me yesterday and ask if we could do some work for them. Mind you, the person asking is part of a clique that takes 45 minute breaks, 2 hour lunches and meanders back and forth to each others' offices for the other part of the day to chat. In short: she doesn't do dick. With people going on vacation and medical leave our staff is limited. Since my boss is on medical leave I was left with the decision. I asked her to clarify her vague email and stated my boss is not available (she was having dental surgery that day). She sent me a snotty response with the same vague wording and said that certainly someone else could make the decision. Fine... I said no. I also copied our IT guy and suggested he help her set up an email for it. She got snippy, told the IT guy to disregard and said she'd speak to her boss. Fine, you do that you little twit.

I mentioned the email to my boss before I left yesterday. She was in one of her moods and said we should try to help. Before I could get an answer back from the little twit about what exactly she wanted my boss jumped in and said we'd do it. Besides that she didn't delete the section that I asked to NOT forward. I was pissed. Part of it was because they don't do shit and this was a total dump. Why make us do work when the IT guy can simply create an account for them? Because they're stupid, that's why...

This morning was hectic. We had a staff member on vacation, another calling in late and a third going home sick. I was not in the mood to deal with laziness, but whatever. The lazy cow emails my boss back thanking her, and adds that "it shouldn't have been made a big deal". I was furious. I was livid. I flipped. I emailed my boss a bitchy letter and then clicked send, knowing it was bound to piss her off. It was wrong, especially since she is in pain. I immediately felt guilty. Instead of a bitchy response she emailed saying I was too negative and that things are going to change, blah blah blah... Before I could send my email she was on the phone. In pain. I felt about two inches high. I blurted out my feelings about how they are lazy and this was a no brainer and she gave her reasons why we needed to keep on their good side. Before I could give my reasons why we should tell them to fuck off and die (not really good reasons, but it felt good to say) our fire alarm went off. Fuck! I jumped off the phone and hurried down the stairs for the mock fire drill.

I came back to my desk and emailed my boss about the 'big deal' comment, saying that could she at least address that. I hit send and her email popped up... addressing it. At least we're on the same page. She told her that it WAS a big deal when staffing is an issue and that I was rightfully concerned. Take that, bitch! She also added that it would be nice if she planned ahead when she expected to use us and explained that we are doing more work than before. I felt vindicated. I... smiled. HAH! The twit wrote back a lame excuse about just finding out (bullshit) and my boss shot back that this isn't the first time they've had a 'last minute' request. End of fucking story.... *shoots middle finger into air and smiles*

Today was a trying day for my nerves. Besides the regular slew of calls I had a guy completely flip out on me as soon as I said, "How may I help you?" Aparently Help = Scream at. After the first SIX times I said "I am trying to HELP you" you went over the deep edge. I decided to kick it into high gear and just.... sat there. I waited for about thirty seconds (which is an hour in silence time... ask JakeD) before reinterrating that I was trying to HELP him and that the only way I could HELP him was if he stopped yelling. I think each time I said HELP it was like a poke in the chest. Just enough to almost say FUCK YOU without losing my job. Finally the little bastard shut up and I put him on hold while trying to track down (and kill) the person responsible for him being on my line. I found the original coordinator who took care of his case and asked for the background. She said that she left a message 45 minutes ago with his wife that he still needed information. Fine. I picked up the phone and began to repeat what she said. Halfway through my ears crawled into the side of my head and shivered while he screamed, "My WIFE?!?! I don't HAVE a wife". I promptly put him back on hold and looked for something sharp as I asked her who EXACTLY she called. "Oh wait. This is a different patient." I snapped, "Fine, then YOU can tell him that" and transfered the miserable bastard to her. Then I looked for something dull. My kingdom for a spoon....

It's freezing at my work! If it's above 68 degrees I'll eat my panties. Try typing with frozen fingers. GAH! I can't believe they expect me to type like this. We went through this last year and had to resort to gloves scarves. You'd think this was the East coast in the winter with all the jackets and blankets draped over people just so they could work. I swear I'm half expecting to see my breath.

Meanwhile all the heifers with hot flashes who bitch about the slightest change in temperature are cheery and I'm freezing my ass off. I'll probably regret this in ten years or so but right now I feel like they should stick a couple of ice cubes up their butts and let me thaw out. The worst part is it's still stuffy in here. No wonder I have yet another sinus infection.

Bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch.... And I'm not even PMSing... YET. Fear my blog, man...

...meets the laziness of state employees. Yesterday my boss went to a meeting and I was left in charge of making sure the calls were being taken care of. Abandonment rate is a big deal for a phone center, which doesn't mean the employees care. Left and right people were putting themselves on Not Ready, making call outs when three people were in the cue and just not caring. By the end of the day I wanted to rip my hair out and dance on their lazy heads. You'd think they would care that each call is a person in need of medical attention. But they were too busy fucking around and not hustling when the busy time started. I'll bet they'd hustle if each call lost equaled an hour of pay. Fuckers...

The Creepy IT Chick does it again. I ask her why her report is off by ten appointments and she tries the 'oh you know, we're going to be off by some' bullshit. I ask her to show me which ones and she starts a whole line of bullshit about the data I give her, blah blah blah... including that it doesn't have the same information. WTF!?! I ask her to show me and after some extra bullshit she pulls up the report. EVERYTHING is there. She starts in with the discussion MONTHS ago and how we agreed to do this and that... whch was major bullshit. After pointing that out (politely) she realizes its on her part and says she has to figure out what's going on.

Fast forward to our meeting with her boss and mine. After she's called on the carpet for the time it takes her to run the reports (hours turns into minutes) my boss starts asking for control of the reports again. While I appreciate her help, it would seem we lose more than gain with it. I mention the issue and she practically dives in to say it's being fixed. Both bosses miss that exchange and I am left with getting a Macro that doesn't work. The hell with that! I confront my boss (in the bathroom) and tell her what's happening. She goes into a long bitch session that I can only cut in on by flushing (I am so getting a flushing sound for my desk). In the end she wants me to alert her boss so she doesn't expect me to get incorrect data. Lovely...

I hate feeling like a snitch, but this chick is Pro when it comes to bullshitting. Lately she's been in the dog house for not following through with her work (even being suspended for three days) and she's not even a fulltime employee. I just hope to get the Macro before she takes off and I am left with hours of work again. Oy...

That lazy cow. My coworker pissed me off three shades of red. No, FOUR. After running a report I noticed one of the referrals was wrong. I called up my coworker (we'll call her HEIFER) and asked what happened. After doing her usual song and dance she said the doctor on the patient's referral wasn't listed so she picked another doctor's name with the last name of 'Weis....'. Oh yeah, THAT just makes all the sense in the world. It's like referring a patient to a Neurologist who needs a Hysterectomy (not real medical problem of patient). Her response: I just chose by the last name I guess. When I said that means my reports are fucked she backed up saying she's sure she doesn't do it all the time. Then I felt my eyes bulge. Heifer is in her 50s. Mentally... not so much.

I tried to find this doctor in the Medical Group and came up empty. He's NOT our doctor. When I mentioned it to her she tried blaming the nurse who didn't catch it. I told her she was right... but that she was ALSO responsible for making sure we had the right info. She blinked. She scrunched her face. She made a 'bullshit' face. I wanted to rip that face right off, too. Apparently I didn't hide said face ripping feelings because she started to back away. After going over to my friend and bitching up a storm I took a deep breath and went over to Heifer with authorization in hand. "Call Facey and let them know the doctor isn't ours and have them change the name. Then get Medical Records. THEN call the patient and let them know." She started to argue about having to call for medical records and my eyebrows flew off of my forehead... then landed back on in a furrowed position. She snapped her mouth shut and took the paper.

Honest to G-d, these people are lazier than a cat in sunlight. We've got some good workers, but it's the ones that don't want to do ANYTHING other than the minimum required that get my panties in a wad. It's not like we're working in McDonalds for Pete's sake! We help patients. These people depend on us. GAH! I need chocolate.

My G-d. The creepy IT chick has been farting... all day. Between taking little sips of air and spraying some old Victoria's Secret body spray I found in the drawer I think I'm going to faint. In other news, my boss sucks and this day majorly blows. :p

I'm a sucky touristy guide person. "jake:s been out here for over three years and the only places he's been is The Ghetty Center, The Long Beach Aquarium, The Renaissance Faire and the Santa Monica Halloween Carnival. To my *weak* defense I couldn't walk far before because of my back so I couldn't go a lot of places. But since the weight loss I am finally able to walk around relatively back pain free. No more excuses. There are a lot of mini road trips to take, so I need to get my ass in gear and do them. Our date night was a wake up call to that. Then there was the conversation with our mutual coworker. "J" wants Jake to go with him on a 13 mile walk for some sort of cause. All I remember is they get a Tiffany necklace at the end. It's going to be on Jake's birthday weekend, so "J" wanted to ask me if I had any plans for him. Nope! Take him away! I think it would be a great adventure to hang out with the guys and do this walk. "J" is super nice and it would be good for Jake to get away. Plus, it's in October... and I don't have plans past this Friday.

I'm a *fake* assistant. At least, that's what my boss says. After noticing a coworker's desk decorated with streamers and a tiara/wand I asked what the occasion was. "It's Administrative Assistants Day". So of course I had to attempt to rub it in that my boss forgot, only to get a 'she does a lot for her boss. Brings her coffee during meetings, buys presents for her and other people on her behalf. She's a real Administrative Assistant." Ouch! I gave my usual sarcastic "oookay" and walked away. But it left me simmering. Since I am not in the mood for a bitch fest today (of all times NOT to be PMSing) I just wanted to list what I do that is as an an asisistand and beyond the call of duty:

What I do as an Assistant:

1. Schedule her appointments
2. Lie for her when she doesn't want to deal with someone
3. Cover for her when she's late
4. Train and re-train everyone on new systems
5. Be the complaint person for every thing
6. Do everyone elses' job duties while maintaining my own
7. Do reports
8. Be the 'second' in command without any official title
9. Listen to her bitch all fucking day
10. Take the blame for whatever goes wrong, regardless of who did it.

What I do beyond my Job Requirements:

1. Call family members
2. Remind her of birthdays
3. Make appointments for her (personal)
4. Work through breaks/lunches/overtime
5. Work from home when sick/on weekends and vacation days
6. Deal with her moods

So basically I need to bring her a fucking cup of coffee and buy something to be an Assistant. Silly me.

Today is an Administrative Holiday. That means everyone else gets the day off and WE have to work. The only bright side is that my boss is taking today and Monday off for her birthday. I don't know what I'm going to do with myself, but it won't be working. She said we could 'wear jammies and run around' as long as the phones were answered. I swear that woman just hit senility or had a liquid lunch. Either way that means we're going to have our own mini party, eat junk food all day and end up sick by the end of it. My second (or third) childhood all crammed into one day. Now all we need is naptime and for someone to get their bra stolen and thrown in the freezer.

Another Thursday, another purple photo.

This photo is from the Robert A Maguire collection.

Every Thursday is Purple-Thursday at my work. You have to wear something purple. It was started by one of my coworkers who loves purple and caught on. I love it because no matter how frustrated the day is when I realize I'm wearing purple I know tomorrow will be Friday. Today this will be my purple for the blog.

Wow! That was.... harsh. The creepy IT chick got her ass handed to her yesterday. As annoying as she is this was still a bit much. I can't say she didn't have it coming. Her boss came by to find out how she was doing on a major report that was due in one day. The IT chick's response: "I downloaded a patch from Microsoft's website." The woman blew her top. "What!?!?! That's all you've done in a day and a half!?!?! We pay you 85 THOUSAND dollars a year for super duper support and all you've done is download a patch!?!?!" At that point I grabbed my keys and went for a walk. I don't care if she was watching midget porn, you don't publicly tear someone a new asshole. That's what offices are for. Besides, who wants to hear that a person in management actually uses the term 'super duper'?

V-Day at work is always fun. It's like the rose parade... complete with snarkiness. All day there have been flowers delivered to various coworkers, each sizing up the new bouquet with the last. It started off with a HUGE basket filled with over three dozen roses and humongous "I Love You" heart shaped balloons. The women were salivating. Anyone who DIDN'T get flowers got the 'do you want one of mine?' comments. Yeah, like that will make it better. Each year I tell myself (and Jake) that I don't want flowers, and each year I wish I would have said otherwise. Then again, it would be nicer to get flowers on any other day just to feel special. Yes, it's snobby. Yes, I fully admit to wanting to partake in that 'in your face' smugness that comes along with getting something special at work. Next year I'm taking out a loan and buying myself flowers. :p

PS: I wrote this while high on pink, red and white M-&-Ms.

The creepy IT chick who sits next to me has been flirting with this other contracting IT guy for quite some time now. They've had noisy lunches at her desk and he is always popping up throughout the day to 'chat'. And by 'chat' I mean 'cleverly ask questions about the program they are both working on while disguising it as just saying hi'. The other day she decided to up the ante and ask him out to dinner. They are two of the most annoying people here so the thought of anything personal makes my skin crawl. If only they spoke quieter.

Anyway, he politely declined... saying he had to pick up something or another (I really was trying not to listen) and I figured he wasn't interested in her for anything other than information. She's a smart girl, right? She should get the hint. Nope. Soon after I walked around the corner to see her giving him an impromptu neck massage and quickly searched for the White-Out to put onto my eyes and erase that icky visual. It was obvious she was going for the kill when he managed to once again slip away. the next day I was walking down the hall and heard him talking to someone about what to do for the evening. I shrugged it off and went to my desk. He followed behind me and as if on cue his cell phone rang. He immediately starts sweet talking then gets off of the phone. She mentions him making plans without her and he says, "That was my sweetie. She just wanted to know what our plans were for the evening." I could almost hear the IT chick's heart breaking. I gave a sigh of relief thinking it was the end of hourly visits and icky flirtations. Don't get me wrong. I don't wish bad on the quirky chick. I'm sure she'll find another icky guy who will appreciate her and treat her right. I just hope it's not while at work. Ew.

I've come to realize that age has as much to do with wisdom as beauty does with clean feet. An older coworker of mine decided to let me know the report I created for her wasn't working right. I checked it out and sure enough she changed some of the filters and screwed it up. Not that she'd admit to it. I fixed the report and went over to show her what 'someone' had done. After hemming and hawing about it not being her (the only person who uses that report) She asked what she should do with all the reports that came out wrong. That was the first clue I was going to have a headache. I asked her how long it had been doing this and her response was 'about a month'. I blinked. She let a report go for a month. I explained that she'd have to run them all again and she started in with the 'Oh hell naw. They're going to have to find someo..." and then I put up my hand. I smiled and said, "That's why you should let me know when someone isn't working right away. You waited, right?" She frowned and nodded. "Then you're going to have to redo the reports." With that I walked away, rubbing my temples.

This isn't the first time she's done something like this. She's almost 20 years my senior and acts like a 16 year old on their first job. Everything isn't her problem, isn't her fault and she shouldn't have to clean it up... even if it is. I had my phase of skirting the responsibility. But I was nineteen and learned fast. This woman is almost at retirement age and hasn't gotten a clue. Personally I don't mind chatting with her, although I try to keep everything work related. It's amazing how two minutes of personal conversation can give you months of 'but you're my buddy' attitude. I am still asking myself if I want to venture out into the management field. Right now I only have to deal with some of the bullshit. as a manager I would have a whole crew worth. I want to leave my current position for something closer to home that doesn't involve pre menopausal managers whose personality changes more than a group therapy session for Manic Depressants without their meds. Decisions, decisions...

The weird IT chick that moved next to me decided to have a mini lunch date with the new guy at her desk last week. She bitches about how loud we are anytime someone asks how her new cubicle is. Meanwhile she seems to have no volume control on her yapper. I would have really liked it for her date. She started off bitching about the Democrats and how they'll see how bad it will get, yada yada yada... Then started in on Clinton (of course). She couldn't understand how Democrats love the guy. Then she added, "I mean... Bush never lied... to a grand jury. He spoke the truth. You know, what he believed to be true." I had to fight the urge to jump the cubicle and slap her upside the head. I've never actually heard someone say that. Sure, there are people who don't read the news and only believe what they hear in church... but this was an educated woman. I had to leave my desk.

Yesterday she comes to work sick (one of my pet peeves). Don't bring your germs to work! How sick she was is up for debate though. Her voice went from a complete whisper (Telling her boss she's completely lost her voice) to normal tone (gossip, gossip, gossip with a coworker). All day long... I almost miss the *hocking* dude. Almost.

Okay, I am majorly annoyed at this IT chick at work. My Boss somehow met with "C" a while back and she talked my boss into automating our reports. I explained that the data was not clean and I had to do a lot of tweaking. C assured me (in front of the boss) that it would be as easy as pie. I remained HIGHLY skeptical. With B's blessing I removed the extra work we had done and stopped the nurses from doing it.

Let me do a brief explanation. If a patient calls we refer them to Doctor A. Three weeks later we check the hospital system to see if that person made an appointment. If they did we check off an area next to the doctor's name so they can see we gave them that patient. If the patient called up and was told Doctor B could see them sooner and saw them we had no way of showing Doctor B we sent the patient there. Enter the text fields in our report. I added all the doctors names into a field so we could select Doctor B if that happened. The problem? It's really not a reportable field. I'd have to count how many times each doctor got a patient and add it into the first section. Confusing? I thought so. M's idea was to change the computer date back to the referral date and enter a NEW referral with Doctor B in it. That made it a lot easier. C said we didn't have to do this so everyone stopped.

Two months ago C was supposed to have automated everything. She told me she didn't want me to do ANYTHING, just send her the raw data. Ooookay. She got back with me a couple of weeks later with a completely wrong number. We went back and forth, with me trying to explain why each part was going to be hard to do. She sends some data to my boss who asks why the numbers are so wrong. "Well, that's the data Diva sent me!" Then B bitches at me about sending wrong data and I have to explain that she asked for it that way. HIGHLY annoyed and now late I am told I have to hand count over 500 appointments because it's not going to be ready. Same thing last month.

This month my boss asks me to meet with C and find out what's going on. The fact that she's uber creepy aside, I don't trust her. Nonetheless I email her for a meeting. she replies, but then cancels. She reschedules and is a no-show. I start working on the month end again. I also decide to populate another text field to try and make the process easier. That's 1600 doctors I have to go through. I email about this to C and she says not to do anything until we meet. Not wanting to be burned again, I ignore her. The My boss emails her and schedules a meeting. Magically she shows up at my desk the day before to see if there's anything we should talk about beforehand. I show her the new project and she starts bitching about my boss. She said B has to give up some of the data she wants. That it shouldn't matter if we get 51% vs 49%. I told her it does but she's welcome to tell B that in the meeting. She said she'll set some things straight. Riiiight.

The day comes and my boss is in a mood. You know, the 'nothing you do is right' one. We meet and she smiles at C and frowns at me. C is chipper and talking about how close we're getting. Blah blah blah . Nothing about setting her straight even came up. I finally said, "Aren't you going to tell B about having to give up some numbers?" She looks nervous then says, "Oh no! With this new data everything should be fine!" Fucking bitch! We leave and I am highly annoyed.

I asked my boss about one report and she jumped down my throat about not telling her about another report we agreed to and to get C back. She comes back in and they have a pow wow while I'm printing the fucking report. I walk in to them saying, "Oh, it's no problem. Good!" Then B gives me the look like 'I can't believe you had me pull her back'. I wanted to scream. I interjected one thing and then the meeting was over. Right before lunch I tried to tell B some concerns I had about C. She jumps down my throat about not saying it in front of her and starts to lecture me about how I *should* have done this. I yelled, "FINE! Forget it!" and started to stomp out of the office. She tried smoothing it over with one of those, 'It's just that it works better that way' bullshit. I looked at her for a second and snapped, "It's about that time of the month, isn't it?" and she stopped. She responded pissily, "I guess it IS." I walked out of the office bitching, "Yeah, I THOUGHT so..." and she was nicer for the rest of the day.

It's a real bitch to be on the same PMS cycle as your boss....

PS: You know I'm PMSing when one post is longer than the rest of the month combined

I woke up this morning to an email about a employee at my work who died suddenly this weekend. She worked there for 30 years 'and will be greatly missed'. They are even having a memorial for her. I have no idea who this person is. Do I ask someone to describe her? Any pictures? Of her, I mean. Not the death. I don't want to seem like I'm waiting to see if I'll mourn her. Imagine going to the memorial, sitting down and getting a pamphlet. "Oops! This wasn't who I thought it was. Scuze me. Pardon me. Scuze me..." MB, RIP where ever you are... and who ever you are.

A nurse I used to work with in the Operating Room interviewed for the RN position yesterday. That's the second nurse from the OR that I've seen. She's actually in the front running for the job. My boss asked me for my opinion (before she arrived). I said, "She's ditzy. Nice, but ditzy." When she frowned I added, "But this has been ten years. I'm sure she's changed some. I know I have." I don't think I'd mind working with her again. Having history with someone means I know her buttons. *evil grin* I kid. I kid...

I was at work yesterday, working away when the fire alarm went off. Since there wasn't a drill announced I grabbed my purse and looked to my boss. She looked at me. That was it. We have fire drills from time to time so that everyone knows what to do when there really is an emergency. So what happened? Everyone hustled around asking what to do and no one even inched towards the door. After a few minutes of people saying, "Well I'm not going. I have work to do" and "I'm not leaving. I don't smell any smoke" the fire marshall arrived and shook his head. Around that time the temp came running in and opened the kitchen door. The smell that came out of there was horrible. Rotting corpses would have smelled better. Aparently she 'forgot' about her popcorn and left it in for too long. And by 'too long' I mean ten minutes too long. My coworker said it had turned colors she didn't think popcorn could turn. Ew. We spent the rest of the day with that horrid smell. Everytime I went near the kitchen I felt like hurling.

As we were getting ready to leave another coworker peaked in and made another discovery. The woman used OUR microwave, which was now ruined. Everyone got together to purchase it a while back so we'd have something of our own. At least they're going to replace it. I just walked in this morning and the room still reeks. Needless to say the temp is keeping a low profile. I REAL low one.

I don't think I'm ready for management. One of the coworkers went on disability for a month and we had to scramble to find help. After the first temp got a job we got another one to take her place. She was really nice, very laid back and willing to work. Yesterday one coworker mentioned "T" had called her the night before and was coming into work today. To say I was slightly annoyed would be an understatement. Not only did she NOT let me know so I could give the temp some warning but she didn't ask what she needed to do before returning to work. All employees have to go to our employee health to be cleared. I called the boss and she was more annoyed, getting "T"'s cell number to try and catch her. Too late. She arrives and I'm stuck with having to let her know she has to turn right around and drive to campus and then let the temp know it's her last day. Very uncool.

After arguing with "T" over protocol she went to call HR and find out if I was telling the truth. Yeah, that made me feel competent. Then I approached the temp. Understandably she was let down. I felt so bad. I guess it showed because after 30 minutes of checking on her she finally patted me on the back and said, "It's okay. Don't worry about me. This is my job." I felt like a shmuck. Here I am telling someone their services are no longer needed and it ends up them consoling me for having to do it. At least this is just a side job for her. I just hate her having that 'don't cut yourself over this' look in her eye as she spoke to me. Oy...

You know, I shouldn't bitch. There are some people out there without a job. But some days letting loose is the only way I can manage to walk into that place.

We have two temps. One is for data entry only and one is an old coworker. The old coworker is a blessing. She knows how to do most of the work so the training is minimal. The other temp is very nice and doesn't know any of our systems. That means 'someone' has to find stuff for her to do. Yesterday my boss caught her reading while waiting for someone to give her work. You know that didn't fly. You know what it did do? It transferred the grief my boss was giving me onto to her. Thank G-d for temps!

I am so annoyed. We are down four people at work right now. My one friend just retired, one girl has the flu and is out til Monday, one has unknown medical issues and is out until August. Then there's the forth one. She came in two days ago and started crying at her desk. I thought someone had died. She ends up going home and calls the boss later on saying the doctor put her out for a week because of stress. I didn't bother asking why. No personal issue needs a week. Then she bops in the office yesterday to drop off the note and you'd swear she just got laid. She was happy. She was laughing. She was literally hopping up and down in her cubicle laughing. I wanted to rip her fucking head off. She comes over as I am talking to the temp agency saying, "We need anyone who can imput data at this point. We're hurting." She smiles, hands me the note and goes back to talk. Considering we are so behind there's no time for chit chat. I walked over, pissed off and asked if everyone was okay with the backlog. One coworker followed me back to see if I was okay. Then she says, "So did she give notice?" WTF!?! Apparently she's leaving the state on July 1st. No notice, either. So she's going to get ready to move, come back and maybe give a weeks notice. I was beyond livid. You just don't do that shit. My boss hired her, gave her a raise and we were all really good to her. I don't understand where people figure they can say 'Fuck it, I'm not transferring' and just screw their coworkers by not giving notice. At least we could start the interview process sooner. My boss says to let it go. What goes around comes around. Usually that's my line. This time I said, "Yeah? I hope what comes around is a swift kick in the ass."

Why oh why do people have to come to work sick? My coworker comes in at death's door and starts hacking up shit right next to me. She can't talk above a whisper and is in need of medical attention. So what does she do? Come to work and infect everyone there. I swear, we have got to have the sickest group in the hospital. Someone's always taking off for doctors appointments or calling in sick. The past two days we were down four people. Everyone was put on doubletime duty. Now that my one coworker decided to come in and cough all over everyone I'm expecting a meltdown any day now. All I can say is that if I get sick I'm going to kill her. Or at least give her the most painful noogie she's ever had.

An old coworker applied for my friend's job. She came in while I was at lunch so I only saw her afterwards. During the interview I heard her voice and the hairs stood up on the back of my neck. When I worked with her in the Operating Room she was hell on wheels. To be truthful, you had to be to survive down there. It was like being in the trenches. Afterwards we played nice and she left. Then the boss asked me what she like in the OR. "Like spitfire" is all I could say. After she told me about the interview all I could do was shake my head. Same chick after all these years, just a tad more psycho. I didn't want to say too much, because it had been a while since we worked together. It doesn't sound like she's going to be hired though. I'm kind of relieved. Lets put it this way, I still have memories of her shrill voice yelling down the hallway. *shudders*

The two new girls that work our department have finally lost their 'new person' shine and are showing their less than attractive quirks. I really like them, so I'm hoping the boss' claim to be able to 'whip them into shape' is true.

The first gal doesn't want to write down notes... ever. So now we're learning about all the mistakes she's done because she didn't listen to directions. She's really pushy, which threw me off at first. Now I just tell her to calm down and it breaks the steam engine that is her personality down.

The second gal is a worldwind of gab. I'm amazed she finds time to breathe. I adore her sweetness but the energery that girl kicks out is tiring. Unfortunately she sits next to the ladies in the next department who love to chat and it's going to get her into trouble. She also seems to forget how to do things, and that's wearing thin on the boss' nerves. REAL thin. Yesterday the bossasked me to show her how to do something AGAIN because if she showed her she'd start yelling. She also caught her painting her nails. There is no way you can be slow enough to paint nails during work hours at this job. When I found out the information I had been begging people to enter into the computer was sitting on her desk I wanted to cry. She doesn't understand the idea of time limits and urgencies. Oy...

Yesterday I went through April stats to get a head start on it. They fucked up on so much stuff... today I plan on having a long meeting with the boss. She keeps saying how she has someone check their work and yet it's not being checked. My daily reports for them are going to be one hundred pages long just so they can check everything. The next step is to hire people to sit next to them and point what to do.

Last week was a mess. On Monday my boss calls me into her office shaking her head. One of my coworkers gave her two days notice that she was celebrating her one year anniversary and could she have the rest of the week off through next Tuesday. She responded with a 'You have got to be kidding' email. After giving her a very hard time she said yes. An hour later the new coworker passed out and had to be rushed to the ER. She ended up admitted for the rest of the week. At that point I would have cancelled the last minute vacation of the first coworker, but my boss decided to let her go (and they say she's always mean). So naturally I had to take over doing their job again, which entails going through over 500 sheets of paper from the fax, sorting the authorizations/medical records out, looking to see if their duplicates and then giving them to people for call backs. I loathe that job. It's amazing how little people think about details when sending authorizations.

Medical Group: Why haven't you called our patient to schedule an appointment?
Me: Because you didn't list a telephone number for them OR you.

I kid you not, this happens daily. They send authorizations without diagnosis, or what they even want the patient to come here for. *shakes head* At least the one coworker (who took vacation) is back today. I will happily dump all the work on her. With a smile. Showing all 32 teeth. Gnashing...

Let me get this straight... The coworker who worked a grand total of 5.5 months out of 12 last year takes off for a week and I have to do her work? AND she doesn't even do the work from last month (yes the WHOLE fucking month) and someone else had to pick up her slack? What kind of deal did she make? Sign me up... I've been on edge every day with the amount of work dumped on me and all I hear is 'you missed out on 30 minutes worth of work because you didn't ask if someone was done'. This job is getting OLD.

This week is going to be hell, hence the sporadic updates. We both have early shifts and are trying to get ready for the week off. I have to pick up a coworker that sprained her ankle and can't walk from the bus stop to work (a good distance) and have to sort through all the little tasks my boss gave me. I came in on Monday to a two-page list of things to do. Some of them are my daily tasks that I've been doing the whole time. When she called (first day on her vacation) I mentioned the list and she laughed, saying it was just a reminder. I commented, "Yeah, because you know I turn into a complete moron when you're not here." She took that well. :p

The new supervisor turned in her one month notice this week. I don't blame her. The people she had to supervise gave her hell from day one. They were upset that their old boss was booted out and wanted my boss to know it. Funny thing is, they didn't do anything but hurt themselves. The new gal tried to stand up for them and make things easier. She spent her days helping them to stay ahead while putting her duties on the back burner. Now they're going to have to be responsible for their own work and face my boss' wrath if they continue to slack off. In short: they fucked up.

After she put in her notice she asked me if I read her resignation email. I said yes and she looked at me and smiled. Then she said, "I covered your ass. When the boss said she didn't know how she was going to find another supervisor with my qualifications I told her she didn't have to. She had the perfect person for the job sitting right outside her door. That she should promote you, give you my responsibilities and take over the supervising part. She agreed." I was blown away. I thanked her and commented that I wasn't going to hold my breath on it. She said that if the boss doesnt do it by the time she leaves to call her up.

Later on that day my friend asked me about the position. Then the IT guy called and asked. Apparently my boss had talked to them about it. The next day my other friend tried to give me the heads up on some very cool news. It would seem she's been talking to everyone about it BUT me. As great as a promotion would be I can't help but be annoyed that she didn't feel comfortable talking to me about it. I can see her not wanting to get my hopes up, but this talking to everyone else about it is rubbing me raw. I'm just waiting for the janitor to ask me what I think about my new position.

The new supervisor at work is showing a different side of her lately. I decided to keep my distance when I first caught wind of her passive aggressive attitude. One minute she's giggly and friendly, the next she looks at me like she wants to kick my ass. Weird... Last night she asks how to ghost her company email so people can't see who it's from. I told her she could do it... but not on UCLA's dime. Then I suggested she just open a fictitious Yahoo account and send it from there. Her eyes lit up like I was down with the scheme (which I wasn't) and started to tell me about her plan. Apparently the two girls who talk shit about her do it in Spanish not knowing that she speaks it. Oy. She she's going to send something to them in Spanish to freak them out. What part of professional does she NOT understand? I just nodded okay and turned back to my desk. I soooo do not want to be in the middle of this school-ground shit.

You know... I've dealt with a lot of bullshit since they decided to 're-organize' our department. My title was unofficially/officially changed to my boss's assistant, my duties are all up in the air and basically I am everyone's dumping ground for what they don't finish. Up until now I've sucked it up and not said a word. Then the new supervisor over the other area in our department said this:

New Sup: "The boss said that we would share an assistant."

Me: "WHAT!?!?! Okay, I'm going to have a talk with her.

New Sup: No need. It's obvious your her assistant. You haven't done anything for me. You don't even do that much for her. What do you do... answer a couple of calls?"

I am was at a total loss for words. The worst part is that my boss is at home dealing with the fires near her house and I can't even talk to her about it in private. Come next week we're going to have a serious talk about my job description... damn it.

Aparently one of my coworkers complained to my boss about me. She felt I was talking to her in a supervisory way when in fact I am not her supervisor. No shit, Sherlock. I guess telling her that the MANDITORY fields she is NOT filling out is considered talking to her in a supervisory way. The kicker is that my boss told her: When she talks to you, it's like I'm talking to you. I wonder if saying, "You're fired, bitch!" will work.

My boss lowered the boom on some of my coworkers today. Apparently they were complaining about calls being transferred to them on Friday and she got sick of it. We've been trying to help them out because three people were out. Actually it was two people and a supervisor who didn't do shit. They still don't understand that she can hear everything from her office. She yanked them into a meeting first thing and told them that the three of them answered 37 calls total on Friday while I answered 60. They also managed to be late on their breaks, which meant I had no idea when they were available for calls. Then she rapped it up by asking if they wanted our help. Their eyes got as big a saucers when she offered to let them do it all by themselves. At least I didn't have to hear them gripe about calls today.

They've been so lucky to be able to get away with so much because their old boss didn't do shit. I don't understand how you can take a job and not take responsibility for your actions. Their old boss came in late, chatted about her children all day and never checked to see how they were doing. When someone got behind she just let it go. Meanwhile patients are waiting for them to get their ass into gear and call them. Now they have to actually be held accountable for their work. The worst part is that there are a few who really work hard and I hate seeing them have to listen to chiding that really didn't pertain to them. Oh well, at least the heats off me for a day.

When I first started in my department it was a g-dsend. Everyone was so nice. It was one big, happy family. We had parties, impromptu brunches, joked with each other and the different areas were almost seamless. The last week before the move I saw a totally different department. People changed. That 'family' changed into greedy distant relatives, each staking a claim to their territory. If anyone stepped over that line an email was shot off to warn others against 'trespassing'. We used to help each other out. Now I heard 'that's not my responsibility' when trying to ask a question. By the time we walked out the door I almost felt a boot kicking me in the ass to move faster. I may have survived the chopping block of layoffs, but I still feel like I lost my job. I just hope this 'new' one is decent enough to stick it out. *crosses fingers*

Picket line, that is. It was the last day at my current jobsite and to be honest my union is doing next to nothing to help us. The last memo about the talks stated that they spent two days talking about what some parking CEO makes. Who gives a fuck? I don't see how bitching about the salary of someone who has nothing to do with the clerical workers is going to do anything about working on the new contract. I am so tired of people bitching about what someone else makes... like that's going to make the powers that be cut their salary and give the money to the clerical union.

As I stood in the elevator section some guy walked up to the glass doors and yelled with a bullhorn "I know you are clerical workers in there." So the fuck what? I didn't even get notified we WERE on a strike before stepping out of my car that morning. I sure as hell wasn't going to not go to work.

My coworkers decided to strike 'for a couple of hours' and left us with all of the work. I think that's full of shit. You either take the day off to strike or sit your ass in a chair and work. My other coworker who stayed ended up having a meltdown on me because of it. She later apologized and cried in my office. I know unions are necessary... but I just wish they'd drop the propoganda shit and do their job.

Oh well, today I start at the new job site. Wish me luck!

It's hard for everyone when a business decides to do layoffs. Everyone goes through a whole gamut of emotions. Sad, angry, happy (that it's not them) and guilt. Right now I'm a little bit of everything (a talent from the Jew in me). I feel bad that my coworker is going, but a part of me want's her to leave already. Once she found out that she was definately being laid off she started being impossible to deal with. Everything that you ask her turns into the injustice of the company.

Me: Do you have any paperclips I can have?
Her: No! But it doesn't matter. In a week I'll be out on my ass and not even have a paperclip to my name.

Yesterday she crossed the line. She came in to my cubicle to whine/cry/rage about being laid off and started talking about how unfair our system was. "Why is it that someone gets to stay based solely on their years of service (me) while someone who has been a hard worker and fast learner gets laid off because she hasn't been here a while (her)?" WTF!?! What makes her think that she's better than me because she can make a fucking graph faster? Mind you, she's slow as shit after eating refried beans when it comes to any of our daily duties. She 'forgot' to do a report needed every 3 months for a whole year. Guess who had to do it... Yeppers, yours truly.

Now I know why they don't give any prior warning to people. I figure she's going to do dick as far as duties are concerned for the next week. She'll be too busy sending out resumes (fine by me) and bitching at me about how she should have been the one they kept (blow me).

< /bitch fit>

I have a coworker that is always talking about how broke she is. When we found out that our jobsite was moving she freaked. "I can't afford to pay ANOTHER penny! That's too much gas with no compensation." After chiding her for being dramatic 48 yrs old and in such dire straits she backed down and said that maybe she was exaggerating a little. Ya think? *rolls eyes*

I stopped feeling bad for her when she started showing off the pictures of the two purebred dogs and purebred cat that she had. There are dogs and cats being put to death every day that need homes. She was even looking into a weekend job to try and help pay off her credit card debts. Buying three animals that costs HUNDREDS of dollars each should have been the LAST thing she thought of doing.

She's also the last hired in our department, and most likely the first to go come May. She's even said that she expects it. She told me she was looking for another job... right before she left early to board her three animals at a kennel for 7 days (around $238) so she could go on vacation with her girlfriend. No, really....

I've been catching hell for my coworker's fuckups this week and I am not happy. What makes it worse is that she's on a week's vacation. She's been giving people wrong info so now our boss is listening in on conversations and tormenting me calling with suggestions on how to handle the call... even if I already know it. If I ignore her intercom she comes down the hall. Can I put a nail strip outside my cubicle? Didn't think so.

My boss made sure I had too much to do on friday. At least I finished it all and added a new report just for good measure. My coworker also approached me and told me that she's looking for a new job. She said that she knew they were going to lay her off just by how my boss was acting and even if she wasn't laid off she didn't want to drive all the extra miles to the new jobsite. Then she cried. *sigh*

I was feeling bad for her until she mentioned that she was leaving early to board her 3 purebred animals before leaving for her vacation. Personally, I would have called off the trip and saved my money... but that's just me. It's very hard to talk to someone who's complaining about their money woes when you know they're spending habits.

By the way... 1,014 people found my NCT site searching for Brianna Banks. Porn rules the internet!