Apparently I'm a tad over zealous. My boss says that a second desk will be needed in case someone else moves into my office at some point and I get another desk. THEN she tells me she was just talking about 'at some point and time'. Meanwhile, the desk they gave me that was sitting in the storage unit is ridiculously big and unnecessary. So now the plan is to wait a week or so and ask for them to remove it. Go me... I'm still in "GO GO GO" mode and everyone else is in standby. Unfortunately my job is supposed to kick into high gear on the 30th and we have dick in place. Everyone says not to worry. Everyone says there's a plan B. Plan B doesn't involve me which means I'll be waiting for mid July until we can switch to Plan A. I want to push but know that it's not good when your boss is the one opting for Plan B. Unfortunately the BBs are not going to be happy. It all boils down to paperwork and that is not acceptable on their level. Personally it isn't on mine either... but I digress.

What I HAVE accomplished impressed the hell out of my boss. This is a good thing. She likes that I am quick and resourceful. She likes that I am friendly and have already managed to get to know the people we depend on. My friend met with her yesterday and she said I was doing a fantastic job. Yay! She aint seen nothing yet.

Two weeks before my birthday I was joking around with a coworker. We were complaining about my boss and her behavior (apparently she has a reputation throughout the hospital). I shot off a 'so find me a job' comment and she fired back with 'I will'. I said I wasn't kidding and she said either was she. Two days later she said she knew about a position that would be 'perfect' for me, but needed to talk to the director about it. A few days after that she said she emailed the person in charge of the job. She said, "Here's the thing. Originally they said they had someone in mind already. The next morning they called me and said that if you were really interested to call or page them." I was so nervous I could scream. After freaking out to Cat and Jake I sent off a friendly email saying I'd love to talk to them about the position. Then I waited. And waited.My friend said the person got my email and 'nearly jumped out of her chair with excitement'. That's a good sign...

Friday, the day before my birthday, I got the call. Let's meet on Monday. Figures... the day I took off to take my car in. I happily agreed and the timeline started. Again I panicked and asked Cat, Jake and Pattie for help on my resume. I hadn't written one in almost ten years. I was beyond nervous. This was such a huge step for me and I had dick prepared for it. After several drafts I finally had one I was happy with... just in time for them to ask me if I had one. Thank goodness for the kindness of friends.

Monday came and I managed to get my car back just in time. It felt so good to be back at UCLA. I ran into a few people who recognized me and made my way up to the office. I was dressed to the nines. They ended up being in casual wear. Heh. The interview lasted over an hour and a half. They loved my resume (thank you Pattie, Cat and Jake!) and even said things like "You used the word 'problem solver' which I really like, so I'm going to use it here". I walked out feeling good. Nervous, but good. The job sounds like a dream come true. It's being created as we speak, so I'll set the rules instead of trying to follow rules that may or may not have been changed by previous people. The only not so cool part is that my hours will be until 7pm at first. Once they see if the workload is slow (or they are able to hire new people) I will be able to have an earlier shift. No more Assistant to anyone. Dude... That alone is a dream come true. The difference between being an assistant to someone and having a supervisor is like day and night. As in sucking balls VS having them slapped across your face.

After a week went by the process started rolling. I got a call saying "You're one of the top candidates" and they were going to call references. Last Friday I got the call saying I was "the TOP candidate", and we needed to speak to your boss. My heart started racing. My hands were shaking. They said to let them know when they could call her after I let her know. My boss came back from a meeting and I made my way into her office. People couldn't understand why I was so nervous. To me, it was like I was breaking up with her. We had spent almost ten years together. We had many bad times, but there were many good ones too. And this job really molded me. I changed so much from when I first started. Some good, some bad. I was pushed into a position that I didn't want for a person I didn't enjoy working with. I learned to create graphs (ha ha), different reports and help manage a department. There was a lot of responsibility placed on me and I was up to the task. But there were bad parts too. My friend Michi said my boss was breaking me. Making me feel as if I wasn't worthy of doing a good job. She's right. I felt like they wouldn't want me when in fact I should feel like I needed to decide if I wanted them. Twenty years experience is nothing to sneeze at. And it's twenty years of growing, not just showing up at the job. But my boss was good at making people feel like they were failing. Any choice was the wrong one. I needed to grow a pair and move up.

My meeting went well. She was happy for me and even shook my hand. She said that if she could find a job closer to home without losing a big chunk of her salary she'd do so in a minute. She also looked sad. It was like we were coming to the end of something and both having to deal with it in different ways. I explained that I wouldn't go until the new hospital was running (whenever the hell that is) and I would do reports for her from home when needed. She said she'd give me a glowing review and with that I walked out of her office, hands shaking and waiting to hear when they'd call. So now everyone is talking about my 'new job' and all I can say is that I won't call it that until they actually tell me I have it. For now I'm the 'top candidate'. For now....

Some days I wonder why I even come into work. Then I remember the bills.... A coworker comes up to me while I'm on the phone and says she'll come back. No problem. She pops by a while later, still on the phone. She says she'll come back. Do you see a pattern arising? She comes by AGAIN and I stop her from leaving. You know... because being on the phone isn't going to change. She announces that she's locked out of her computer and can't get in. Oy... I call the IT guy and he tells her to restart. I go back to my call. A while later she comes by to let me know she still can't get onto her computer. And by 'a while' I mean 'over an hour'. I contact the IT guy who tells her to restart and it's lather, rinse, repeat. So she comes up tell tell me that she has yet to get onto her computer and I ask her why she didn't tell me. 'You were busy'. WTF!?! I'm ALWAYS busy. I tell her to stick a note under my face if I'm on a call and she says, 'It's not that serious'. Oooookay. Cue the boss coming in late and finding out said coworker hasn't been able to sign onto her computer for two hours. Guess who's fault it is. I'll give you ONE guess. So yeah, I get the fucking riot act for not going over to her desk and standing there while she tried to sign onto her computer. The last I heard it's a password issue... otherwise known as a UE. Now I'm told the hard drive is going bad and it's still my fault that she didn't tell me she couldn't get in. Any rational person who's job solely relies on them being able to sign into the computer would raise hell if they couldn't get on. Yeah... welcome to UCLA. Home of the lazy. Meanwhile I'm working through lunch (as usual) and my boss said, "I could have kicked you out of your cubicle so she could have a spot, but I found other people." Gee, thanks. You're so kind.

My limit is seven apparently. My boss hit me with twelve emails. Three asking for the same thing. Two updating. This is in the span of five minutes. I was already doing the daily reports (12 different reports lumped into one end result report). On top of that I'm dealing with patient complaints, VIP patients and doctors wanting to refer their patients. All at the same time. One report I missed her comment about simply letting her know when it was done so that she could send it. Then she added that I didn't add a heading to it so they could figure out what information they were looking at. Both totally my fault. Even so... I couldn't help but feel that she was baiting me into fucking up. She's adding different reports, changing how she wants them... then calling me about new reports at the same time. I'm so tired and just feel like crying. The worst part is that she said she wanted to start putting everything in writing (paper trail) because we aren't on the same page anymore. No shit. I'm back on page twenty and she's on page 55/92/3/67/89/6/and all of the above. I know she has a suspicion about the job offer. Either someone reads my rants and tells her (FUCK YOU) or she's so nosy she listens to more than I think she can. Either way... I feel like my time here is growing short and I'd better get my ass in gear.

Yeah, so my boss just HAD to be a cow. So much for her being in a good mood after her birthday. She intercoms me to create a report for another department. I asked her what criteria she wanted and she respond "The one you do all the time for them." *blink* Since when? I literally sat there... staring at her. I finally said, "I don't remember doing one 'all the time'. Could you give me a hint on what they want at least?" She snaps back that I did one about a year ago or so when they were going to blah blah blah.... So apparently ONCE over a year ago is 'ALL THE TIME' in her book. Even she realized the absurdity in that statement and lowered her voice towards the end. IDIOT. I create so many different reports for so many people that it's impossible to remember every detail. Especially when they ask for different criteria each time. And doubly especially if the said report is OVER A YEAR OLD. Jake, in all his wisdom added "I get laid ALL THE TIME! Works for internet nerds".

Oh yes... this is just priceless. I emailed the person for the prior report so that I could see what criteria they wanted. They forwarded me the last email I sent with the report attached... dated MAY 2006. She can just eat my ass today. Seriously.

I was talking to a manager about a case the other day and they complimented me about how helpful I was. I quipped "Hire me" and they said they'd love to. I said I was serious and they said, "So am I". With that I floated through the day. The next day we spoke again and they mentioned having a few positions in mind but needing to run it past the director first. I didn't push. If it happens it will be great. If not, it was a glimpse into what I need to do to get out of my current position. I need to start now. I need clothes. I need to start exercising more. I need to start feeling better about my situation. I need to come to work when on death's doorstep so I can accumulate some sick time and not have a bad looking record. I was honest about my work situation and that I was not looking for anything in particular. I really do enjoy my job. I like *most of* the people I work with and tolerate those that annoy me. Even my boss, for all her faults, isn't the worst I've had. She's gotten a LOT better. The biggest downfall I see is that she refuses to acknowledge that she's done a good job and has some wiggle room to ask for things. She still jumps and asks is this high enough when anyone looks her way and never tells people to back off. It's sad really. She's more interested in getting the approval of people who have nothing to do with her job than making the people who work for her happy. I am not looking for a new job to get away from her. She's manageable. But I'd rather be in a position where I was appreciated more and the duties weren't expected on a whim. I don't even have a job description... but if I did it would have one word on it: Peon.

Creepy IT chick strikes again. After offering up the world she comes through with Jersey. I've been waiting to finalize a major report for four days. She was supposed to run a Macro that gave me all these wonderful numbers. They gave me numbers all right... just the wrong ones. I spent all this time trying to just get everything else ready so I just had to insert the last part and it was for nothing. First my boss changes two parts of my report (four more reports instead of two). Then she says she only wanted ONE part changed. She gives me three days to finalize it and on the fourth (when it was due) I was still waiting on the numbers. Here's the kicker. I said I could redo a years worth of data to make the report look nice. CITC said no problem. Then at 4:45pm yesterday (you know... when I usually leave) she announces the data WON'T be the same because we changed how we gave it to her a few months back. WTF!?!?! If she told me this I could have either sent her the updated data or at least finalized the fucking report. So here I am, busting ass to redo the last section while my boss is bitching at me. I also told her which sections she'd have to work on HOURS before so it would be finalized when I entered my info. Did she do anything? Of course not! Instead she sat there fuming at 5:08am as I packed my shit up and walked out the door. I'll be damned if I'm going to stay over to listen to her bitch about why SHE didn't do her info. Today she seemed okay with it, although she managed to twist around how it was my fault for Mary not notifying me about the data change. This from a woman who can't keep a fucking email that was sent to her FIVE seconds prior.

I am so angry right now I could just spit. *spits* My boss has decided to come in today after a meeting and asked me to help make a doctor's appointment for her. The reason? She's coughing up green (IE CONTAGEOUS) and needs antibiotics. The idea that she's even in a meeting infecting people is beyond rude. But to tell me she's going to be coming her and bringing her germs in when my resistance is already low is just beyond... words. I want to tell her to stay away. I want to tell her to keep her infectious ass home and have some fucking respect for all the people around her. I don't even have a mask or some Lysol to spray around me. If I get sick again it's going to be Workman's Comp... Fucking cow.

I am gloating. It's a bad BAD thing to do... but I just can't help it. My boss called in sick today and she sounds bad. Like she's suffering. Like... she has the same shit that knocked me on my ass. I can't even pinch an ounce of pity for her either. All I can do is just sit here with a smirk on my face and think, "It's about fucking time".

Before you shake your head... I spent last night driving home and until I went to sleep in tears. Because of the recent car lawsuit (to be explained later) and other issues I've been pretty tight on finances. To the bone, so to speak. So this illness couldn't have come at a worse time. The last three days I was out it was without pay. My boss *could* okay my use of vacation time, but it's her choice. She chose not to. I have worked my ass off for her, staying after hours and working from home. She has called me on my days off and generally just been a bitch to me. Still... I've supported her. So her telling me 'I have to find out from HR' and then holding off on telling me until the end of the day (knowing I'd be upset) really put a bad taste in my mouth. She knows my financial situation. It's not because I've spent money on bullshit things. Now I'm weighing my options on how to get by until my taxes come in. The part that angers me the most is she made some sort of third person decision. "THEY said I had to stick to policy". Fuck you. I know the policy. It's the supervisor's discretion. So now Karma slapped her for being such a cow to me and my gloating pretty much means I need to do some serious good deeds to not get hit again. Does buying Girlscout cookies from little girls pass as a good deed?

My boss is at work... sick. Not even just a little sick, either. She's coughing up a storm and not even covering her mouth. the ignorance astounds me. How someone who has been a nurse for almost thirty years can think that sitting in an office somehow makes everyone immune from your illness. I've been wearing long sleeves to I don't have to touch doors and doorknobs. The ventilation system sucks ass so that's the first issue. We're all breathing the same air. someone coughs on the far right and it comes right over to our side.

Right now I have zero sick time and am sweating bullets. I was out for three days without pay and my boss hasn't said anything so I guess I'm humped this next paycheck. I don't even want to risk going in there to ask her if I can use my vacation... especially since she's 'in a mood'. Add to that that she's been talking about retiring more and more... I'm so screwed if she does. Showing 20 years experience means dick when you don't have any sick time to show for it. If my leg gets chopped off I'm going to wrap it in an ace bandage and hop my way into work.

Odessa: So... Russian roulette question time
Jake: ?
Odessa: I looked at my calendar and its PMS time for Mila and myself
Jake: oh Jesus
Odessa: She's a raging bitch
Odessa: Should I remind her?
Jake: In the most subtle way possible, lest you both rush at each other and suddenly I look out the window and see a fucking mushroom cloud hanging over your office area

Yeah, so this week should be interesting. I'm guessing we'll be found in her office, me with my eyes gouged out and her with a broken neck, by the end of the week. Having the same cycle is a bitch when it's your boss. Add to the fact that she can be a royal bitch at ANY time of the month and you've got a one way pass to the unemployment line. Or the police station. Which ever.

Some weeks are bad and some are really bad. Then there's this week. If I had to rate it on a scale of pain (one being an ache and ten being amputation and disembowelment by psycho killer) I'd have to rate it a 6.5. Seriously... losing a limb by Michael Myers isn't that far behind what this week has done. I've had patients from hell, incarcerated patients whose cases needed to be hand carried (with no less than 15 calls a day) and coworkers who found any and every opportunity to weasel out of their responsibilities with a simple 'I didn't know'.

Last night I even had a guy in a moving truck stalking me... for about eight miles. Everywhere I went he veered into my lane to follow. At first I thought he was just not paying attention. Then just an asshole. By the time I pulled into the grocery store parking lot I realized that he was following me. I parked and called Jake to let him know and the guy circled the huge lot... twice. There were plenty of spaces to park too. Then he seemed to disappear, but not before I called Jake again to tell him to hurry up. As we pulled out of the lot I spotted him, sitting in the van across the street, blocking traffic. He pulled out to follow but got stuck at the light. Thank goodness for slow people. Finally there was a death of a coworker's mother. I had to sit there while my boss tried to marginalize the issue. "Well, she knew it was coming". As if losing a parent to cancer VS a car accident is any less painful. Now I'm sitting here and begging for five o'clock to come so I can fly out of here and just vegetate with Cat and Mark while praying that this weekend takes forever to end.

When "life" equals "job" and "rain" equals "tears" it pretty much sums up my day. It started off hectic, dealing with patients complaining about the mail being slow (as if I had anything to do with it) and problem patients who don't seem to be going away. After dealing with all that crap I call my boss to ask a simple question.. what day a patient was being scheduled for. I couldn't find the actual date anywhere in my notes and wanted to make sure of the date before I started calling around. apparently I didn't ask correctly and she went off. Not only did she start berating me for asking her but made me feel like a complete idiot and incompetent. Her tone was as if she was talking to a five year old and she felt she had to rehash the whole fucking ordeal. G-d forbid she should just tell me the answer to my question. I went into defensive mode and it was a mess. She continued her idiot-tone when she arrived at work and anything I asked was treated as if I didn't do my job. so I went off. I REALLY went off. It was a mess. Finally I went into her office and we had a looooong talk. I gave in to some points and stood my ground on others. Give and take.. it's what a relationships about, right? In the end I think I shared a tad too much (I told her about people who ask how I can deal with her) and wasn't happy about the leaking tears bit (I'm stronger than that, damn it!) and worked it out. Unfortunately I made her teary eyed about the people making comments thing, and that was not my intention. She made hints that I wasn't happy with my job and should move on and I threw back that she needed to be a tad more tactful when talking to me. I was happy with how the conversation ended, even though I would have liked to have NOT mentioned the peoples' comments. Part of me felt she needed to know how others viewed her (she tends to think everyone loves her) and part of me wanted to shut the hell up and be done with it.

My boss has gotten so much better over the years. No matter what she's still the best one I've had. People look at her as if she's the devil and I just laugh. I worked ten and a half years in the Operating Room. Those women would rip your throat out and chew on it while gossiping about how you looked as said throat was being removed. Any back talk was met with vile threats and they'd write you up just to pass the time. I'm sure there are better. I'd kill to have some of the bosses that work around us. Then again, the productivity level is pretty low compared to us and I'd probably go nuts trying to get them to do more. Work... it's what you do not what you try to get out of.

Bonus misery of the day: Creepy IT Chick just let out a horrendous fart that made people down the hall look. Dude... no class.

I killed three of my fish. *sigh* I bought all these extra things to help the tank be better and ended up lifting the center piece and basically poisoning the remaining fish that we couldn't catch before setting everything in place. Between that and my fish doing kamakazie flips out of the bucket I had a really sucky end to an otherwise decent weekend. A weekend I REALLY needed too. Between being hammered by calls the three days I was in and the end call being a lazy assed patient who only called because she didn't want to pay the toll to make an appointment I was at my wits end by Friday evening. Luckily my boss was there for the conversation and even sent out an email to tell everyone how well I handled the call. Just remember me when the yearly review comes around... that's all I ask.

Gee... Christmas is early this year. My boss, fresh from our fight yesterday has decided to avoid me like the plague today. Either that or she's giving me the silent treatment. It's a win win situation. Mind you, I literally sit right in front of her office. I turn my head and there she is. She had a meeting with a few of the workers and had them ask me a question rather than her call me on the intercom. She's emailed me five times rather than call me, meet with me or just intercom me. It's silly, childish and a cross over between a good day and an annoying day. Good, because it's less that I have to deal with. Annoying, because we're both adults and she's acting like a two year old.

Anyone want a boss? More than slightly jaded, unpredictable and horrible memory. Prone to snippy remarks and the blame game. Price: FREE.

I walked into the refrigerator I call my cubicle and managed to crack a smile without cracking my face. The temp is in the low 60s now (was in the fifties) and there's NO heat coming out of the vents. Needless to say no one was in a great mood. My boss caught an issue that we've had with the report for OVER a year and she made the decision to keep before. It seems that the coldness cracked her skull and she NOW decided that it's something to fix. One problem: There's no easy fix outside of not counting it. Cue the drama. I get to try and explain to her the issue and get attitude back. I toss it at her and we're on the road to a bitch-fest. She decides that MY description isn't good enough and pulls the nurse in. After making me explain to the nurse the issue she starts throwing random decisions out, none of which are easy and ALL of which she stopped doing before because of the errors. Then she tells me she doesn't like my tone. MY tone. She's being a total bitch and basically saying I'm not good enough to explain a simple issue... and I have the attitude problem. Yeah, so I stormed out of the office and haven't said shit to her. I spent a few minutes on the phone with Jake, trying not to cry (and failing). This is going to be SUCH a shitty day.

My boss, in a moment of kindness, decided to give me four hours work time for the time I came in to finish her report on Thursday (and the hours I spent retouching another report on Friday) while sick. The problem? My sick time kicks in after using two days of vacation time. Because she marked me as being there it reset the time back to vacation. Considering I was also taking three days vacation the next week it made me short in time. Also... she's on vacation and not able to be reached easily. It's a great thing until you need her. Now I have to have her sign some error sheet to make it all sick time so I can finalize my payroll sheet that's due at the end of this week. Oy. She bitches about me not remembering things and then totally forgets that I told her NOT to mark me there. *sigh* Hopefully she'll get it fixed in time. Bonus points for giving me four hours working...

I'm so sick of feeling... sick. My boss called yesterday to find out if I was going to be there to finish the big report. Not once did she even ask how I felt. You gotta love the empathy. Actually she did ask if I was getting better. But it was more a demand than anything. "Are you getting better? Or do I need to make other arrangements to get this report done?"

If only life were like video games. In games you just run around and pick up health points to get better. On the verge of death? Here, take this box with the red cross on it. ZING! Much better... Oh? Still not ready for battle? Here's another health pack for good measure. That big bad guy got you in that 'not so fresh' mood? Kill him and take his life points. ZING! Now don't you feel much better? I am sooo not going to be safe to drive near on the freeway this morning...

My boss *finally* got the approval for her vacation time. That means for the next six days she'll be hanging out with family and having fun. Meanwhile I'll be fucking around at work and having fun. Lately we've been getting along great, which is a really nice change. This vacation is just what the doctor ordered. Plus, her whole ordeal with having to wait until the last minute to know about her vacation helps us in the long run. She'll be more mindful when approving ours now that she knows what a strain it is to make tentative plans. Meanwhile... I am just sooo fucking happy that this weekend is the end of daylight savings. One more hour of sleep, baby!

Part of the area we're *loosely* connected to department wise decided to email me yesterday and ask if we could do some work for them. Mind you, the person asking is part of a clique that takes 45 minute breaks, 2 hour lunches and meanders back and forth to each others' offices for the other part of the day to chat. In short: she doesn't do dick. With people going on vacation and medical leave our staff is limited. Since my boss is on medical leave I was left with the decision. I asked her to clarify her vague email and stated my boss is not available (she was having dental surgery that day). She sent me a snotty response with the same vague wording and said that certainly someone else could make the decision. Fine... I said no. I also copied our IT guy and suggested he help her set up an email for it. She got snippy, told the IT guy to disregard and said she'd speak to her boss. Fine, you do that you little twit.

I mentioned the email to my boss before I left yesterday. She was in one of her moods and said we should try to help. Before I could get an answer back from the little twit about what exactly she wanted my boss jumped in and said we'd do it. Besides that she didn't delete the section that I asked to NOT forward. I was pissed. Part of it was because they don't do shit and this was a total dump. Why make us do work when the IT guy can simply create an account for them? Because they're stupid, that's why...

This morning was hectic. We had a staff member on vacation, another calling in late and a third going home sick. I was not in the mood to deal with laziness, but whatever. The lazy cow emails my boss back thanking her, and adds that "it shouldn't have been made a big deal". I was furious. I was livid. I flipped. I emailed my boss a bitchy letter and then clicked send, knowing it was bound to piss her off. It was wrong, especially since she is in pain. I immediately felt guilty. Instead of a bitchy response she emailed saying I was too negative and that things are going to change, blah blah blah... Before I could send my email she was on the phone. In pain. I felt about two inches high. I blurted out my feelings about how they are lazy and this was a no brainer and she gave her reasons why we needed to keep on their good side. Before I could give my reasons why we should tell them to fuck off and die (not really good reasons, but it felt good to say) our fire alarm went off. Fuck! I jumped off the phone and hurried down the stairs for the mock fire drill.

I came back to my desk and emailed my boss about the 'big deal' comment, saying that could she at least address that. I hit send and her email popped up... addressing it. At least we're on the same page. She told her that it WAS a big deal when staffing is an issue and that I was rightfully concerned. Take that, bitch! She also added that it would be nice if she planned ahead when she expected to use us and explained that we are doing more work than before. I felt vindicated. I... smiled. HAH! The twit wrote back a lame excuse about just finding out (bullshit) and my boss shot back that this isn't the first time they've had a 'last minute' request. End of fucking story.... *shoots middle finger into air and smiles*

The Creepy IT Chick does it again. I ask her why her report is off by ten appointments and she tries the 'oh you know, we're going to be off by some' bullshit. I ask her to show me which ones and she starts a whole line of bullshit about the data I give her, blah blah blah... including that it doesn't have the same information. WTF!?! I ask her to show me and after some extra bullshit she pulls up the report. EVERYTHING is there. She starts in with the discussion MONTHS ago and how we agreed to do this and that... whch was major bullshit. After pointing that out (politely) she realizes its on her part and says she has to figure out what's going on.

Fast forward to our meeting with her boss and mine. After she's called on the carpet for the time it takes her to run the reports (hours turns into minutes) my boss starts asking for control of the reports again. While I appreciate her help, it would seem we lose more than gain with it. I mention the issue and she practically dives in to say it's being fixed. Both bosses miss that exchange and I am left with getting a Macro that doesn't work. The hell with that! I confront my boss (in the bathroom) and tell her what's happening. She goes into a long bitch session that I can only cut in on by flushing (I am so getting a flushing sound for my desk). In the end she wants me to alert her boss so she doesn't expect me to get incorrect data. Lovely...

I hate feeling like a snitch, but this chick is Pro when it comes to bullshitting. Lately she's been in the dog house for not following through with her work (even being suspended for three days) and she's not even a fulltime employee. I just hope to get the Macro before she takes off and I am left with hours of work again. Oy...

My boss is going on vacation for a week starting this Friday. This means, of course, that she will be making my life hell right up to the second she walks out. Last minute reports, enough work to make me behind for a month and all the little side jobs she can think of. Whenever she goes away she HAS to make sure we are too busy to have any fun. The irony is the minute she walks out all work will be set aside and we will spend the week having fun, doing as little work as possible. Stay tuned for the panick ridden 'oh shit she's coming back and I haven't done a fucking thing' post.

I just love my job. My boss commandeers my coworker so I have to drive alone to some stupid class on a program I'll never use and then ditches me when they get there. I felt like it was Junior High. The worst part is she made us leave an hour and fifteen minutes before the class was to begin on a drive that takes twenty minutes... tops.

Me: I'm here. Where are you?
Boss: We're shopping. Bye. *click*

WTF!?! So I was left sitting in an empty room alone while they were out having fun. At least I got to leave early. Suffice to say you could have fried an egg on my face with the look I gave them when they *finally* arrived.

Oh yes, I certainly know how to shoot off my mouth. my boss stepped out of the office and my friend was sitting there so I jokingly went to her and said, "Do you know what I got for AA Day?" When she asked what I said, "Insulted." I told her I was told I wasn't a real assistant, then turned and saw my boss standing outside of the door in mid swig of her water bottle. Her eyes got big, then narrowed. I smiled at her and said, "Isn't that right, M?" Inside I was searching for some imaginary rock to crawl under. I'm sure the backlash will be when I least expect it, but whatever. It's not like I wasn't going to bitch at her about it at some point. It's like one of those moments when you slip on something and do a double flip and somehow manage to land on your feet. You do a 'ta da' and hope everyone thinks you meant to do that.

I'm a *fake* assistant. At least, that's what my boss says. After noticing a coworker's desk decorated with streamers and a tiara/wand I asked what the occasion was. "It's Administrative Assistants Day". So of course I had to attempt to rub it in that my boss forgot, only to get a 'she does a lot for her boss. Brings her coffee during meetings, buys presents for her and other people on her behalf. She's a real Administrative Assistant." Ouch! I gave my usual sarcastic "oookay" and walked away. But it left me simmering. Since I am not in the mood for a bitch fest today (of all times NOT to be PMSing) I just wanted to list what I do that is as an an asisistand and beyond the call of duty:

What I do as an Assistant:

1. Schedule her appointments
2. Lie for her when she doesn't want to deal with someone
3. Cover for her when she's late
4. Train and re-train everyone on new systems
5. Be the complaint person for every thing
6. Do everyone elses' job duties while maintaining my own
7. Do reports
8. Be the 'second' in command without any official title
9. Listen to her bitch all fucking day
10. Take the blame for whatever goes wrong, regardless of who did it.

What I do beyond my Job Requirements:

1. Call family members
2. Remind her of birthdays
3. Make appointments for her (personal)
4. Work through breaks/lunches/overtime
5. Work from home when sick/on weekends and vacation days
6. Deal with her moods

So basically I need to bring her a fucking cup of coffee and buy something to be an Assistant. Silly me.

Today is an Administrative Holiday. That means everyone else gets the day off and WE have to work. The only bright side is that my boss is taking today and Monday off for her birthday. I don't know what I'm going to do with myself, but it won't be working. She said we could 'wear jammies and run around' as long as the phones were answered. I swear that woman just hit senility or had a liquid lunch. Either way that means we're going to have our own mini party, eat junk food all day and end up sick by the end of it. My second (or third) childhood all crammed into one day. Now all we need is naptime and for someone to get their bra stolen and thrown in the freezer.

My boss is nuts. Seriously. Not only does she know EXACTLY what kind of relationship I should be having, but what kind of future we are planning. I was sitting at my desk, minding my own business, when her carpool buddy came by to show her a baby blanket she had knitted. It was pink and frilly, that's my take on it. I had just taken a big gulp of water when my boss blurted out, "This would be perfect for Odessa. She's planning on getting married and they'll be having a baby sometime after that." I choked on the water, spitting it everywhere. "Wha...!?!?!" was all I could get out. She held the blanket up, as if I was going to coo at it. "Leave me out of your baby plans please" was all I could say before cleaning up all the water.

Jake and I are NOT having children, outside of any accident. We're perfectly happy right now and not willing to give up our time. Selfish? Maybe. But at least we're sure of what we want. Too many people pop out children without understand how much of their personal life they are sacrificing. As in all of it... Everything changes when you have a kid. Your time becomes theirs and the money is tight. Right now we're living just within our means, and making plans that will make money tight. Besides... pregnancy scares the hell out of me. I fully admit to being terrified of the process. The things it does to your body and then there's the whole birthing process. *shudders* The only way I'd want to have a baby is if they came out of tubes. Just add semen and watch them grow! Fun for the whole family. Personally I'd still want a sea monkey family.

Monday day sucked ass. First my boss asks me to contact a director's assistant to confirm a conference room. After asking several people I tell her I don't know who the assistant is. Her response: "You've met her. Do you remember the Christmas party three or four years ago, when the ex CEO played a harp? She played it with someone who played the violin. The person playing the violin is his assistant." After staring blankly at her for a few moments I said, "I meant in some official capacity. Not at some function I didn't want to be at and didn't pay attention to." We went through a few rounds of did not/did to before she broke down and gave me her fucking name. Then she moves on to asking if the conference room was ready for a meeting I didn't know about. Again with the blank stares. After that she goes into the meeting and someone intercoms me asking if we ordered food. I go and ask her and assumed it was here (my fault) so she comes out. Nope, they just wanted to confirm an order change. She walks back down the hallway muttering, "You guys (meaning me) need to clarify before saying they're here." I yelled out, "Wha...!? You need to CLARIFY that you even ordered the food!" She ignored me and everyone else stared, jaws dropping. I swear to G-d... That woman is going to drive me batshit.

My head is killing me. I went to work early today expecting a week's worth of work to catch up on. What I DIDN'T expect was for my boss to tell me to put it all aside so we could work on a powerpoint presentation I did for her TWICE before. Apparently they decided to change it again. So we spent the next six and a half hours redoing everything... and I left and hour and a half late. That's without a late break and working through half my lunch. I am sooo going to bed right now.

We had a meeting to discuss holiday dishes and the subject of Ham came up. I smiled and said nothing while a coworker chimed in, "Isn't that something you don't eat?" I responded that she was correct, Jews don't eat ham. With that my boss blurted out, "Well I don't let something like religion get in the way of eating food." After I found my jaw and re-attached it I simply said, "How nice" and left out the part about hoping she'd feel the same when I converted to Satanism and preformed human sacrifices for lunch. I was highly annoyed to say the least.

My coworkers decided to do the 12 days of Christmas food this year. Each day someone brought some dish for others to munch on. Wednesday was Titos day. Titos Tacos is a well known Mexican food joint that cooks old style food. They line around the block to get some. The girls happened to mention that it was cooked with pork fat and I politely declined to taste. My boss started to fuss then thought better. I guess I had the 'say it and die' look on right. I swear she's going to be my first sacrifice...

Why do people get all bent out of shape when someone chooses not to eat their food? Suddenly I'm a poor sport for not going against my religious beliefs and munching on reheated tacos. I don't celebrate Christmas. I'm Jewish. Hello? What part of 'Not the Messiah' do you not understand? I've been called a Scrooge for refusing to put up decorations. Every year I go through the same shit. I never demand they put up Chanukah decorations and change their decorations to generic holiday crap. You want to put up a tree? Go for it. Wreaths and ornaments more your thing? Have at it. I have no problem with people celebrating their religious holidays... Just don't thrust that shit on me. Bah, humbug.

Last week was fun. And by fun I mean sucking donkey balls. It was my first week back at work, so of course my boss starts in on me. I am still pretty weak so working is tough already. Tuesday we were at each other's throats. She was blaming random shit on me that I had nothing to do with. A nurse misses a call: My fault. A coworker forgets to give her info from before I was back: My fault. It was getting stupid. I bitched at Jake only to hear, "Honey. Don't forget you just started your period and you two are on the same cycle." Fuck! So I shot her an email that simply said, "FYI: I started yesterday." She came back and asked me what it meant. I said,

Me: Think about it. What happens once a month... usually around the same time we're at each other's throats.
Boss: Ohhhh.... I forgot. I even checked Monday since I felt more short tempered.
Me: Riiiight.
Boss: I was wondering why you were overly sensitive
Me: Wha!?! Oh sure, and you're the Rock of Gibraltar.

After that it was much better. I told Jake and he just shook his head. "I don't get it. How can two people be going for the jugular one minute and laughing about it the next just because it's hormonal?" Welcome to the whacky, crazy, scary world of women, honey...

Okay, I am majorly annoyed at this IT chick at work. My Boss somehow met with "C" a while back and she talked my boss into automating our reports. I explained that the data was not clean and I had to do a lot of tweaking. C assured me (in front of the boss) that it would be as easy as pie. I remained HIGHLY skeptical. With B's blessing I removed the extra work we had done and stopped the nurses from doing it.

Let me do a brief explanation. If a patient calls we refer them to Doctor A. Three weeks later we check the hospital system to see if that person made an appointment. If they did we check off an area next to the doctor's name so they can see we gave them that patient. If the patient called up and was told Doctor B could see them sooner and saw them we had no way of showing Doctor B we sent the patient there. Enter the text fields in our report. I added all the doctors names into a field so we could select Doctor B if that happened. The problem? It's really not a reportable field. I'd have to count how many times each doctor got a patient and add it into the first section. Confusing? I thought so. M's idea was to change the computer date back to the referral date and enter a NEW referral with Doctor B in it. That made it a lot easier. C said we didn't have to do this so everyone stopped.

Two months ago C was supposed to have automated everything. She told me she didn't want me to do ANYTHING, just send her the raw data. Ooookay. She got back with me a couple of weeks later with a completely wrong number. We went back and forth, with me trying to explain why each part was going to be hard to do. She sends some data to my boss who asks why the numbers are so wrong. "Well, that's the data Diva sent me!" Then B bitches at me about sending wrong data and I have to explain that she asked for it that way. HIGHLY annoyed and now late I am told I have to hand count over 500 appointments because it's not going to be ready. Same thing last month.

This month my boss asks me to meet with C and find out what's going on. The fact that she's uber creepy aside, I don't trust her. Nonetheless I email her for a meeting. she replies, but then cancels. She reschedules and is a no-show. I start working on the month end again. I also decide to populate another text field to try and make the process easier. That's 1600 doctors I have to go through. I email about this to C and she says not to do anything until we meet. Not wanting to be burned again, I ignore her. The My boss emails her and schedules a meeting. Magically she shows up at my desk the day before to see if there's anything we should talk about beforehand. I show her the new project and she starts bitching about my boss. She said B has to give up some of the data she wants. That it shouldn't matter if we get 51% vs 49%. I told her it does but she's welcome to tell B that in the meeting. She said she'll set some things straight. Riiiight.

The day comes and my boss is in a mood. You know, the 'nothing you do is right' one. We meet and she smiles at C and frowns at me. C is chipper and talking about how close we're getting. Blah blah blah . Nothing about setting her straight even came up. I finally said, "Aren't you going to tell B about having to give up some numbers?" She looks nervous then says, "Oh no! With this new data everything should be fine!" Fucking bitch! We leave and I am highly annoyed.

I asked my boss about one report and she jumped down my throat about not telling her about another report we agreed to and to get C back. She comes back in and they have a pow wow while I'm printing the fucking report. I walk in to them saying, "Oh, it's no problem. Good!" Then B gives me the look like 'I can't believe you had me pull her back'. I wanted to scream. I interjected one thing and then the meeting was over. Right before lunch I tried to tell B some concerns I had about C. She jumps down my throat about not saying it in front of her and starts to lecture me about how I *should* have done this. I yelled, "FINE! Forget it!" and started to stomp out of the office. She tried smoothing it over with one of those, 'It's just that it works better that way' bullshit. I looked at her for a second and snapped, "It's about that time of the month, isn't it?" and she stopped. She responded pissily, "I guess it IS." I walked out of the office bitching, "Yeah, I THOUGHT so..." and she was nicer for the rest of the day.

It's a real bitch to be on the same PMS cycle as your boss....

PS: You know I'm PMSing when one post is longer than the rest of the month combined

My weekend went by so fast. It's been nice to be busy. I'll get to that in a minute. Why does my boss think it's a good idea to call me at home and tell me about a report she needs ON A SUNDAY? I noticed a message on my cell phone from when we went to the movies. She called to tell me about a report that was needed... then ended by saying she'd forward me the email. *blink* Why not just forward the email? I can't do anything til I get to work anyway. Oy...

Anyway, we've been keeping ourselves busy these past couple of weeks, which has been really nice. Last weekend we shopped and spring cleaned, which which was long overdue. This weekend was dusting, and more spring cleaning. We're working on one area at a time, which is perfect. On Sunday we had breakfast with our friend and her husband. Afterwards we raced to Century City Mall to see The Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest. One word: Awesome. It was funny, full of action and special effects that made it even better than the first. There were a few moments that they I could have done without, like the father reinacting the breaking of the lamp, but the movie moved on to be all that I had hoped for. I think you need to see it again to appreciate all the details. Davy Jones' crew was amazing. You need to look closely to really appreciate them. The sword fighting scene was one of the best parts. I cannot WAIT until part three comes out!

My boss should be in the rodeo. I've never had someone ride my ass for so long without at least getting a leg cramp. If all goes well she'll be with her family today while her mom has surgery. As I was leaving she mentioned coming here. I flipped. I said, "Are you out of your mind?" When she protested, saying that there was nothing for her to do there I semi yelled, "Yes, yes there is. You can be with your family. Supporting each other. You need to be in the waiting area with your family." I didn't want to mention what else was on my mind. If something happened and her mother died on the table, she'd be all the way out here. No WAY would I wish that on anyone. I don't get people. If I dropped dead today they'd have someone in my seat tomorrow. When it comes to the important things in life you need to put work second. I know I do. I cannot wait to have surgery for my back just to get out of there for a while. I am not even going to answer the phone. If they can't figure out how to do something then they can improvise. Then again, it's said that I'd go under the knife just to take some time off. :p

My boss showed up at work today. Apparently her family matter is put off til Thursday. So how did my day go, you ask? We fought. She snapped, I yelled, people cowered... and the group that sits near us gave me sympathetic looks. I cannot believe she got ONE sentence out of her mouth before chomping down on my ass. I let her know that too. After our initial head butting she backed off and kept to herself. I just can't WAIT until Wednesday. Really. *grabs razor-blades*

You know, I shouldn't bitch. There are some people out there without a job. But some days letting loose is the only way I can manage to walk into that place.

We have two temps. One is for data entry only and one is an old coworker. The old coworker is a blessing. She knows how to do most of the work so the training is minimal. The other temp is very nice and doesn't know any of our systems. That means 'someone' has to find stuff for her to do. Yesterday my boss caught her reading while waiting for someone to give her work. You know that didn't fly. You know what it did do? It transferred the grief my boss was giving me onto to her. Thank G-d for temps!

Okay, so I may be needing to find a new job pronto. My boss asked me to have coffee with her and talk. It would seem there is a probable big shake-up happening and her future is iffy. That also means mine is. She'll find out more on Thursday, which bites... because that's two whole days away. We had a really nice chat though, which was refreshing. I busted my ass today trying to get a four part report out so she could show the powers that be how well we are doing. She was happy with the result, which was a relief. Needless to say, :Jake: and I have some rethinking to do on our plans. *sigh*

My boss is coming back to work while still recouperating from pneumonia. I am not thrilled. Besides the fact that she should be resting I don't want to get sick. I get pheumonia every time I get a cold and I don't need her bringing in a ready made germ. I loathe when people come to work sick. It's so inconsiderate. Just stay home and get better. No one gets brownie points for bringing their colds to work. We have a coworker who insists on coming to work sick. Everytime I hear her cough or sneeze I want to spray Lysol over the cubicle wall. Well, it's off to work. Red Team, Go!

The past two days have been so enjoyable. Yesterday I spent twenty minutes fighting with my boss in a yelling match that silenced half the floor. The reason? She claimed I didn't tell her about a bug with some letters I created. The bug that SHE originally found months ago and made me sit on the phone with the programmers of the software to find the cause of. The bug that she told everyone about. No way in hell was I going to let that go by. So we both butted heads on it while my friend stood there, in utter silence with her jaw on the floor. At one point my boss yelled at me to 'stop saying you told me' when explaining it. I retorted 'Fine. But I DID tell you.' my friend thought she was going to lunge for me. Whatever. Later that night I jumped out of the shower and saw hives. I figured it was just the shower with the heat of the day. By three I was going nuts. No way was I going into work like this. So I called my boss and was greeted by a 34 minute scolding about how I'm letting stress get to me and that it's a pattern. At one point she said I needed to find a way to get rid of the stress. I said, 'Fine. I quit.' She wasn't amused. She kept on about how it was mental until I balked. My eye is red, I have blotches all over and it's itching like crazy. It's NOT mental. Then she went on to my diet and started bitching at me about that. Honestly it would have been easier to just go in. I need to find a new job. I have so many things I'm planning that it's the worst time to start looking. As soon as that's over I am making a B-Line for the job section.

I wanted Friday off to do some errands, but my boss' new ONE person off at a time rule fucked that up. It's not like we're a small department. She offered a compromise and would let me leave early. When I told her the latest I could make my hair appointment was 12:30 she balked. FUCK. Now she says that IF it's slow and IF everyone else shows up I can go. I am taking the chance and not cancelling my appointment. We're also celebrating her birthday so I'm hoping she'll be in a giving mood and just let me go. Meanwhile, Jake has the whole day off and is going to see Slither AND Brick. Butthead.

My job hit a new low today. After two hours of bickering my boss and I were reduced to bitching at each other via emails. The fact that she's less than ten feet away and in full view of me made it even more ironic. The whole thing was over some work she told me to put aside, then asked why it wasn't done. I finally reminded her of that and she gave me the classic "oh yeah" look. I could almost hear the wheels churning as she tried to think of a way to turn it around on me. In the end I won this round... Until she started in on me about how she wanted it to be taken care of so it didn't happen AGAIN. Oy vey. Ten minutes later she grabbed her coat, smiled and said, "We made it through another day!" As she walked away I yelled, "BARELY!" and listened to her laugh on her way out the door. *grumbles* I wasn't kidding...

Yesterday was a joy. I sat down at my desk and was interrogated by my boss. Each report she asked me about had the same response. "No, it's not done." The worst part is that I heard a familiar tone... the tone she used to give me when she thought I was slacking off. The tone that said, "I wan't to order people around". I waited until the people in her office left (although I had to fight the urge to kick them out) and laid into her.

Me: I don't know if you're hungry, grumpy or forgetful but your line of questioning was unacceptable. Last week you told me I had no deadlines and to focus on doing the other groups' work. You even told my coworker I had no deadlines and was available to work. I did this through this week and Friday I left at 11am.

Boss: Yes, but it's Thursda...

Me: Yes it is. And what did I do all yesterday? I found out that only FIVE days in January are correct for the report that's due next week. I spent all day working on that. AND this morning... We're not even halfway to finding out what happened and then they have to fix it.

That shut her up. She tried again later about a report that was late because the letter she was writing wasn't done... I felt like it was a test to see how much I'd remember.

Boss: Why didn't you remind me?

Me: What?!? I asked you. I reminded you. I EMAILED you.

Boss: Yes, but...

Me: But nothing. I can only remind you so much. EVERYTHING was ready. All I needed was that letter with your signature.

I swear that woman will never take responsibility for any screw ups on her part. A half hour later she tried to say she thought it was the letter for the other report. I told her I showed her the letter to sign and that she even came over, saw the report on my desk and asked why it wasn't out. I'm not going to let her wiggle out of this one. Five HUNDRED pages sitting on my desk that I worked on are now in the shredder. *sigh*

Getting back into the swing of things is harder than I thought. My mind is still on vacation-mode. Work has been hell the past two days, so hopefully it will mellow out by the end of the week. My boss has been in an uber cranky mood and everyone else is taking that as a cue to bash her. Honestly she's not the evil person they want to make her out to be.

In other news I have yet to get that raise that goes along with all the extra shit I am taking on. If it doesn't come by next week I'm going to go on strike. You want the work? Pay me for the job.

This week is going to be hell, hence the sporadic updates. We both have early shifts and are trying to get ready for the week off. I have to pick up a coworker that sprained her ankle and can't walk from the bus stop to work (a good distance) and have to sort through all the little tasks my boss gave me. I came in on Monday to a two-page list of things to do. Some of them are my daily tasks that I've been doing the whole time. When she called (first day on her vacation) I mentioned the list and she laughed, saying it was just a reminder. I commented, "Yeah, because you know I turn into a complete moron when you're not here." She took that well. :p

Jake and I had a great weekend. We lounged around on Saturday and then went to my boss' house on Sunday for a party. I arrived to a house full of family and no other UCLA people. It made me feel really good. She introduced me as someone she works WITH instead of someone who works FOR her. Everyone was very kind. Jake and I spent most of the time talking to her uncle, who is an absolute doll. It was really nice to see her in a different atmosphere. She looked very happy.

We decided to take the scenic route home and drive through Kanan Road over to PCH. At one point we stopped to take pictures (which will be posted soon). The day was clear and a light breeze that made it heaven. The beach was almost empty which made it even more beautiful to drive through. I honestly didn't want the day to end. *smiles*

I finally finished the huge report that was due and readied myself for the big showdown: Telling my boss if I don't get a raise then I don't want the position. After asking about the increase she gave me the news: 10% increase in pay. Hot damn! This chica is going shopping! After I pay off a couple of bills, that is. Still, it's incentive enough for me to keep doing this job for the moment. Feel free to bookmark this rant and send it to me when I come to my senses and wonder why I ever stayed... :p

The reclassification was approved so I will be starting in my new position on December 12th. I am waiting to finish the huge report before asking about the raise. When I walked into work yesterday I expected the usual cold shoulder from my boss. What I got was a VERY cheerful, "Odessa! Welcome back!" I stared at her for a moment, waiting for her to start in on me for being sick. When that didn't happen I said, "Wow. I expected you to throw a shoe at my head or something." She ignored me and continued to be cheerful. Later on she asked what Jake and I were doing on Sunday and if we would like to go to a party at her house. I felt two emotions at once. First I felt like I was finally going to sit at the big peoples' table, then dirty for wanting to. It's moving over from Us VS Them mindset into the Them VS Us. Now I know why my boss had reservations. It's a huge change. You can't be chatty with the people you're going to supervise. Don't get me wrong, I have no intentions of donning leather and becoming a dominatrix (sorry, Pos). But these guys are a tough group and always look for an angle to work against you with. I learned from the supervisor who's leaving that being nice doesn't cut it. They were so hell bent on being hard asses that they didn't see how much she fought for them. They're going to when she leaves, that's for sure. *cracks knuckles* ... ew.

I called in sick again and my boss was pissed. There was a huge report due today that wasn't finished. I felt bad until she started in with 'I gave you extra time' shit. The two weeks prior were taken up by Thanksgiving and her constant little tasks. Everything was priority and even when I told her that I needed to work on the Month End reports she stacked more shit on my plate. I was waiting for the AAs to add the missing information so I could complete that report. When I gave the sheets to their supervisor I got 'they don't have time to do this' and she handed them back. Fine. I went to my boss and asked what I should do and she took the sheets, saying they had to make time since it was information they left out. Lovely... Away went my report and that's the last I heard if it. When I mentioned it to the boss today her response was, "Well I guess I gave it to them then!" She was one step from yelling. I finally said, "Look. I've been sick all last week and came in to do the reports. Now the hives are bad and I can't wear clothes. You know I'd come in if I could. I did last week." After that she said "I know" a couple of times and then started complaining about having to do the reports herself. I offered for her to send them to me so I can do them from home but she ignored me and hung up. I am sooo not looking forward to tomorrow. I have to go in, but I dont want to hear the flack. I just need to keep repeating, 'You gave me twice the work on top of the other added tasks not counting my own and expected me to do it in half the time." If that doesn't work I'm going to start looking for a job pronto. This is bullshit.

/ rant

My boss called me into her office yesterday to tell me that she was giving me a promotion. We talked about it for a while and then she asked me to write out my duties so that she could submit it for approval. Apparently I still have to wait for them to agree to reclassify me. She also said that she didn't know if the reclassification would give me a pay raise. That seriously blows. Why give me all this added responsibility if you aren't going to pay me for it?

She also talked to me about how I should not be chit chatty with the coworkers (the other AAs) so that they can accept me in this pseudo supervisor role. I agreed with her on that. I've never been accepted into their little clique so we have always kept our distance. I wonder how they'll treat me now? At best they were pleasant when they needed something from me. It didn't matter much because I'm there to work. I look for friendship on my own dime. The one AA who gets under my skin is going to be a challenge. Hopefully my boss can keep her at bay.

I will find out within the next two weeks, so keep your fingers crossed. If it's a yes then a start my new role December 12th. Oh joy, oh rapture. All I can say is that they'd better pay me more....

The new supervisor turned in her one month notice this week. I don't blame her. The people she had to supervise gave her hell from day one. They were upset that their old boss was booted out and wanted my boss to know it. Funny thing is, they didn't do anything but hurt themselves. The new gal tried to stand up for them and make things easier. She spent her days helping them to stay ahead while putting her duties on the back burner. Now they're going to have to be responsible for their own work and face my boss' wrath if they continue to slack off. In short: they fucked up.

After she put in her notice she asked me if I read her resignation email. I said yes and she looked at me and smiled. Then she said, "I covered your ass. When the boss said she didn't know how she was going to find another supervisor with my qualifications I told her she didn't have to. She had the perfect person for the job sitting right outside her door. That she should promote you, give you my responsibilities and take over the supervising part. She agreed." I was blown away. I thanked her and commented that I wasn't going to hold my breath on it. She said that if the boss doesnt do it by the time she leaves to call her up.

Later on that day my friend asked me about the position. Then the IT guy called and asked. Apparently my boss had talked to them about it. The next day my other friend tried to give me the heads up on some very cool news. It would seem she's been talking to everyone about it BUT me. As great as a promotion would be I can't help but be annoyed that she didn't feel comfortable talking to me about it. I can see her not wanting to get my hopes up, but this talking to everyone else about it is rubbing me raw. I'm just waiting for the janitor to ask me what I think about my new position.

I swear, we are not some sort of creepy slob types. We simply have a fan by the bed. On Jake's side. On the dresser. I am always telling him not to place things on there that could blow onto the floor, especially things that could be harmful to the cats. That being said I walked into my boss' office yesterday to give her a report and walked to my desk. I was looking at my flip flop to find what was on the heel to make it slippery and hear her call my name in some freaky voice. I turn around and she's pointing to something on the floor. Then she picks it up. I walk in and as I get closer the shiny square packet comes into view. She's holding a USED condom wrapper. Words can not describe how mortified I was. I stood there with my jaw to the floor, not even knowing what to say. Then she said, "I'm going to complain to the management about this... and go wash my hands." I almost died. She left the office and I wanted to crawl under a rock and hide. A minute later she brought in the building guy to show him and he said, "The janitors usually carry trash bags with them and it probably fell off of one of them." I felt like I dodged the bullet of a lifetime. Then she brought in random people to look at it in the condom in the trash. You'd think they never saw a fucking condom before. Actually, some of them probably haven't. When Jake called I quietly threatened his life. After telling him what happened he burst into laughter. The trash is going on HIS side of the bed, damn it...

Yesterday I snapped. My boss changed my report AGAIN, then wanted to know why I wasn't finished with it. I guess I should feel honored that someone thinks I work that fast... but I don't. I almost wish it would go back to her thinking I was a fuck up and could do nothing right. The expectations are so much lower and I had time to breathe. Right now I'm working like a dog and not getting breaks. Meanwhile my coworkers are whining about their everyday, nonchanging tasks. I would kill to have a schedule like that. If they keep up on the whining I just might...

I checked out that position and made a decision: Oh hell no! Not only would I be 'assistant' to 4 pissy women (and 1 who is my friend) I would also be an assistant to the doctor over them... who has a reputation of being just as pissy.

My boss 'mentioned' that it wouldn't be a job I'd like (for the same reasons) and that I wouldn't get a raise because I'm at the top of my pay scale. I told her that I talked to Jake about it and decided that it wasn't something I wanted. Being closer to home would have been a plus, but I like my job and don't want to change it now. Later on she was complimenting me for finishing up a big report and I said that she'll miss me when I'm gone. She said, "You're not going anywhere. I'm moving a bed in and your staying in here. I'll give you a the worst recommendation. 'You don't want to hire her. She's horrible'." I feel so loved... I think.

My boss asked me to fax something to this lady who used to work in the same department as us. She begrudgingly told me that it was info for the position in her department. At my old job site. NOT as a slave. I am now trying to decide whether or not I should apply for it. I like the people that I work with, but my job duties are getting larger with no chance of a pay raise. Decisions, decisions...

I dont wanna move! My boss just told me that the new supervisor is taking over my spot and I have to move to outside of her office. I am so not pleased. It's not the sitting outside her office part that bugs me, it's the sitting outside her office WITH NO ONE AROUND that I hate. At least when I want to talk I had my friend on the one side of me and the three ladies from the other department on the other side. Now I have to go over to even say hi... and of course I can't talk shit about my boss because she's right behind me. :p

Mondays are bad enough without my boss being on a rampage. She'd hug my coworker then turn and bitch at me about something I had nothing to do with. The last straw was my afternoon break:

Me: *picks up intercom* Yes?

Boss: Since XXX left early I am the back up. You are also the back up. I need you to log back on now and not log off. When is your break?

Me: Now.

Boss: Fine. Take your brea...

Me: I am taking my break.

Boss: Okay. Take your brea...

Me: I AM ON MY BREAK.

Boss: Oh. Okay.

It was like she HAD to order me to do something. I wouldn't have cared except she had been doing this all fucking day. I finally went into her office to ask what the prolem was. I asked if she was on the phone and got no response. After standing there and looking at her frowning face, I walked out and yelled, "Forget it!" Then she starts calling me back in... It's like a fucking game. I asked her what was wrong and she started talking about all this shit which would have pissed me off too. I wasn't going to let her off that easy though. I said, "Yes, but what is wrong with ME? I've been answering their lines since I started and only logged off to do the report you asked me and for lunch. If you're pissed at them, fine. But what did I do?" She couldn't even respond. She talked more about what was going on... but this time her tone was more acceptable. I waited until she stopped and then repeated that I have been here supporting them since before 8am... She said she knew and I turned and left.

I know she's under mounds of stress right now and I wouldn't trade her job for the world. But it would be nice to not have to play 'guess my mood' on a daily basis.

My boss just offered to pay me for two days work if I did some work over the weekend. Oh hell yeah! Getting ANY time over the forty hours is pretty much impossible, but I'll take two days banked in a second. It will help me to recoup some of the time I lost when I was sick.

After my boss walked away my friend came up and said, "You know she'll never let you go." I don't know whether I should take that as a compliment or a threat. Either way I'm planning escape routes just in case...

Last night I dreamt about work. I also dreamt about a rap video that talked shit about Eminem. I hate when I can't remember the complete dream. This morning the bits and pieces I did remember left me saying "WTF!?!"

I have been working like a dog at my job. I feel like I'm at 50mph and about to hit a brick wall. Luckily it will be over soon. When my boss goes on vacation I'll have a week and a half of rest... which means I can catch up on two months of work that hasn't been done.

Yesterday we talked and she gave me some big news about our place. I can't say anything because she hasn't told the rest (sorry guys). She also told me not to let anyone take shit from me. "When you are talking to them it's like I'm talking to them." It's hard to imagine me as a tiny philipino chick but okay... She has caused me grief over the years that I've been there, but for the most part she's been the best boss I've had. She's very protective of her staff and finds ways to prove our worth. Hell, she kept us from being laid off. She's much easier to deal with now that she has the job she deserves and sees that I am I harder worker than she thought. That being said... I can't wait to get a breather! I don't care how nice your boss is, it's always nice when they aren't around. :)

My boss, that is. She's been sick with pneumonia the last couple of days and I've been taking over the duties. She called me yesterday to give me an update and I started talking about what I had done. She stopped me and said, "Odessa? I just wanted to thank you for all that you've been doing. You've been working very hard and I appreciate it. I don't know what I would have done without you." I was floored. She's not the kind of person to give out compliments. It made me feel so much better. Right now I'm doing the work of five people while they 'get comfortable' with the new system. My boss told their supervisor to that it's going to stop come July. In reality I will still have to clean the database, but that's half the work. It's really nice to know that she appreciates my work. Either that or the fever's made her delirious...

I've been catching hell for my coworker's fuckups this week and I am not happy. What makes it worse is that she's on a week's vacation. She's been giving people wrong info so now our boss is listening in on conversations and tormenting me calling with suggestions on how to handle the call... even if I already know it. If I ignore her intercom she comes down the hall. Can I put a nail strip outside my cubicle? Didn't think so.