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« February 2009 | Main | April 2009 » March 30, 2009A Blast From the PastWe had Friday off and no cash to go anywhere. Between the bills and trying hard to save up for the trip we've been staying at home for the most part. Home = lots of gaming and a wonderful time at my sister's house. *grins* I've been having so much fun with Fable 2 I haven't even glanced at any other games. I briefly tried Mass Effect, but I didn't care for the shooting style. Plus, I still have a long ways to go before I am used to more free movement (up/down/targeting/etc...). I keep telling myself I'm going to switch up games so I don't get sick of F2, but each time I manage to spend all my time on that game. My sister messaged me about meeting up for dinner. I was so happy to finally be able to see her and her family. Sunday Jake and I trekked over to her place and I met my niece and brother-in-law. Diana looked great, her kid was absolutely adorable and her husband was just too cool for words. We had a blast talking about the past and some of what has been going on. It's funny... I haven't seen her in so many years and yet I felt like it was yesterday. It's nice to see she's still the wacky person I remember. Jake and I talked about it on the way home. He said he noticed a difference in me. I told him that leaving the house I felt a little more complete. Don't get me wrong, I feel that my decision to move away was good, but it came at a price. I found who I was and a place to put my feet on the ground. But the price was missing out on part of my sister's life. I can't wait to see my brother and his family when they come out. It's still a slow process for me. So many years of finding out who I was and etching out a life. Now I'm having to back track as it were to mold it into something different... more complete and yet with some holes that will never be replaced. If there's one thing life taught me is to appreciate what you have. Right now I feel pretty fucking lucky.
[keywords: family xb360] March 26, 2009Day Off?Oh yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes! I get tomorrow off, which is all sorts of awesome. Since Jake and I are trying to save up for the trip it's going to be a lot of lounging around and taking turns on the XBox 360. I know I'm going to have to give it up so he can also watch his movies, which is fine. I've been enjoying myself with the games and new community so much that I need to catch up with all my friends. My newest venture, however short lived, was to go online while in Fable 2. I changed my settings to EVERYONE and suddenly all these shiny new orbs popped up. It was fun to watch them dart around. I did this so I could get some help on an achievement (my newest obsession) but the guy who was going to help me couldn't see me. After spending over an hour trying to meet up with him I gave up and played my game. We shot some voice messages back and forth so I had my headset on. Because I'm new to the whole online gaming phenomena I totally forgot about the mic. After trying to do something I yelled out my favorite word "Fuck!" and then realized everyone could hear me. Talk about guilt! Later on our food arrived (it was my turn to cook :P ) and I started asking about mayo. Oy. Of all the conversations on there I'll bet mine was the strangest. "Fuck" and "mayo" are two words I'd rather not be associated with my online rep. :p
[keywords: holidays xbl gaming] March 25, 2009Dodging BulletsJake dodged another bullet today. The department he transferred out of was just laid off. All of them. I've known some of those women for years. They were good people, just too comfortable in their positions. They narrowly saved their jobs the last time the lay off bug hit. If the economy was any more stable they'd have no problem finding a position. Right now... *sigh* It's really scary out there. I think this is the first time we've had people that we knew on a personal level lose their jobs. I've known people before, but we were more like acquaintances. When the person is someone you genuinely care for it's harder to swallow. A million things are running through my mind, and all I can think of is that I hope something comes up to ease their minds.
[keywords: Work layoffs economy] March 24, 2009Twitter is Puttering OutTwitter seems to be having fits lately. I've gotten at least ten "Over Capacity" messages today alone. When it's not giving me the annoying pastel whale picture I get a skewed version of the page, complete with missing icons and icky orange font. *grumbles* I hate getting hooked on something and then not being able to use it. It's like the time I did Crack Cocaine. Okay, I lied. But I'm sure it's how I would have felt IF I did something so stupid. Meanwhile I am still totally hooked on Fable 2. I'm dragging my character's feet as long as I can before taking on the next major quest. At this rate I should finish the game sometime next year.
[keywords: twitter] March 23, 2009Again?!?I love my job. Seriously... for the most part it's a great place to be. It's during those moments of stupidity here and there that irk the ever living shit out of me that I wonder what the hell I'm doing here. Take today for instance. ONCE AGAIN I get a call from a section in the admissions office asking me where a patient is that I sent in. I have quite a few that will request future admissions for various procedures, which means I have no idea why Mr. so-n-so didn't show up for his admission ten days after I requested it. Once again I start making phone calls to find said patient. You'd think I would know better by now. So of course the patient is already here. Now they're annoyed, the clinic is even more so and I look like a dolt. The worst part is when I call to alert them of this obvious mistake I don't get any apology. No 'Oops! my bad.' for sending me on a wild goose chase which in turn I hand over to the clinic who then tracks down the patient only to be cussed out for annoying them. The best part... They just called me to make sure I am double checking things before sending them over. WTF!?!
[keywords: Work] March 20, 2009Take a Class, Damn It!The creepy Librarian popped into my office yesterday, this time she came right up and behind my desk. She stood there, staring at my computer screen. I quickly clicked down my data (HIPAA, anyone?) and asked if she needed something. She did that staring thing that creeps me out to no end and then started talking about how she tried sending some article she got online to a doctor and it didn't work. After trying the easy way out (Her answer to who the IT person was for her dept: 'Oh, I don't know.') I tried to see if I could explain it to her without having to leave the office. A few minutes of her talking made me start thinking violent thoughts. The term 'boot to the head' kept running through my mind and I figured it was time to get her out of my office. I sprang out of my chair and told her I'd come look at it. She said, 'Oh I didn't want to bother you'. I responded, 'Sure you did. You came down here and asked me' before realizing how snarky that sounded. Bah. Once in her office I looked at the document she was trying to send. There was an email to a friend feature on it, but who knows what she did to screw it up. After clicking on save I asked which email she was trying to send the document to. I clicked reply and showed her how to insert the saved document. With that I tipped my invisible hat and went back to the comfort of my office. Two minutes later she's back. Apparently the email she showed me was the wrong one. GAH! I wrote down how to attach the file and explained it to her. She had that 'you mean you're not going to do it for me?' look on her face. I ignored it. She started talking about how she doesn't know computers and I responded with, 'You know, my friend just turned 75 (total lie) and finally decided they wanted to learn computers. They took a beginners course and now can do things on their own. Empowerment is wonderful.' She skulked away, none too pleased with my lack of movement towards her office. Ten minutes later the Creepy Librarian returns and my patience officially hits rock bottom. She starts talking about the SEVEN other articles that didn't work that she needs to resend (have I mentioned I don't even work for the same department?). I told her to follow my instructions and she'll be okay. She starts whining about me going too fast on the saving part and her not knowing how to do it. I told her it's very simple. There's a button on the top left hand side that you click. Then you just make sure it saves to desktop. That's it. Follow my instructions on the paper and you're good to go. She wasn't budging. She started whining AGAIN about me going to fast originally and her not knowing how. I told her that she needed to call the IT people if there is a saving issue (It's more like a user issue) and turned back to my lunch. She started to ask if I could come down as I took a big bite (so I didn't have to talk) and said, "Oh. You're eating." No fucking shit. I said through my food, "Yes. I'd like to finish my lunch while I have a chance." She started to say something again and I stopped her. "Look. I've explained EXACTLY what you have to do three times and you haven't even tried it. I understand that you are panicking. It's something new. At least TRY my instructions before saying you don't know what to do." With that she stomp/skulked away and I thought about closing the door. A little while later she passed by my office, glaring. Whatever. And now... for a random moment at work: A patient wandered into my office asking where the rooftop was. *blink*
[keywords: Work Creepy_Librarian creepy_people] March 19, 2009Hanging with the Cool KidsJoining XBL has opened a whole new world of possible friends to chat with. It's actually pretty cool if you are able to keep your head down low and stick to the interesting conversations. I feel like I've found a new part of me to grow with. I really enjoy the games, although I need to keep on top of how much time I spend on the console. It's also something that's brought Jake and I closer together, which is a bonus. We have played a few games together and are able to talk about something else we both enjoy. I love sharing things with him and to be able to talk about the games, the playability, etc... is really helping us. I want to also travel, but the money is tight and I'd rather save for the big trip next month so we can have fun. Plus... the Wii crapped out on us so it has to be fixed. NEVER buy something from someone without getting the receipt. Another lesson learned. *rolls eyes* On a side note the operator just told me she loved me again. I couldn't stop giggling. That's the best way to say 'Oops! I miss-dialed' EVAR.
[keywords: boyfriend jake xbl gaming forums] March 17, 2009Gee... That SuckedLast night's meeting was less than stellar. I sat around as three groups of doctors discussed my new duties. Each adding their own version and how it should be done. Meanwhile my boss and I just sat there... not saying a word. You could tell that any sort of objection/clarification/recommendation was going to be met with less than friendly responses. Today my boss called and I tried to talk to her about my take on it. Her first response was that she wanted me to not be obstructive. WTF!?! I clarified that trying to make sure there is some sort of procedure put in place that everyone agrees upon BEFORE winging it is not being obstructive. It's making sure that it will succeed. She understood and we talked about the issues, etc... I am not happy with this 'just wing it' attitude I have been getting. First of all there are patients that need to be taken care of. Secondly... it's my ass on the line. I'll be damned if I'm going to just start something without some sort of idea as to how it works, what is needed and who is going to do it. Add to the problem that half of the new duties are dependent on rooms that won't even be available for one to two years... you're damn right I'm freaking out. My boss also added that I am in a management role and therefore need to start making these decisions on my own. I really like my boss... but this mentoring without being there is getting frustrating. I want some guidance, damn it. First all decisions are to be made on a higher level and given to me. Now I'm 'winging it' and letting her know in case she has any objections or suggestions. She also brought up the ever popular 'learning curve' that I'm on. Without anyone to teach me it might as well be a wall. Straight up, no traction. Here are some skates... go at it.
[keywords: Work stress boss] March 16, 2009I'm Kinda Freaking OutJake gets extra kudos for handling my temper tantrum this morning. This weekend I FINALLY got my taxes done. That's at least a month later than usual. Add to it that the State Refund will be an IOU and it's all going to pay off my credit card... I should have mailed that sucker out on Saturday. Then there's the job. The one thing I requested when I first took this position was a buffer. Two two BBs are doctors, and pretty high up on the totem pole. This means their patience is thin and their line of reasoning may not always be the best when it comes to rationality. They're the kind of bosses that say "I want a nice house" but don't give you any tools to build it with or a blue print to start off. My boss is the person who has been doing this. She understands that houses just don't materialize. It's up to us to work with the contractors, painters, decorators, etc... to create the house and sell the look to them. That being said... I have a HUGE meeting that I was told I am going to tonight. I was also sent random emails from doctors about a job duty I knew nothing about. Enter freak-out mode. I called my boss who said she heard something was in the works but nothing concrete was said. Oy. After telling her about the emails and phone call she said, "It's a good thing that they feel comfortable enough to go straight to you." That wasn't helping. Then she added that I know more about it than she does. Also... not helping. Between the money, wanting to save for our trip next month and my job getting vague duties tacked on that my boss isn't even aware of made me super sensitive. Not full bitch-mode... but yeah. Jake handled the situation wonderfully and is really the only reason I'm not in the corner babbling about the end of the world. I don't know what I'd do without him. Oh yeah... have the XBox 360 to myself.
[keywords: Work boyfriend jake stress] March 13, 2009The Battle of the MeowThe XBL battle of the sexes rages on, complete with snarky remarks and butthurt. After a few guys warned me about the evils of online gaming I sought out the Gamerchix clan. I was told they'd be a great place to meet people who would be interested in playing for fun without all the pick up lines and vulgarities. Apparently the first thing a guy goes for when he loses is the crotch. If you're an innie there's no chance of getting out without a slew of obscenities. After a month of trying I was finally in. Then it dawned on me... I have no skills to play. *sigh* A quick look around the XBL board made me glad that I at least got my foot in the door. The Gamerchix are super cool and hell bent on making sure you have fun. The main board is fun, but you need a boat and paddle to wade through the testosterone level. Yesterday a guy posted a bitch fest about why he gets the third degree when asking to friend a chick. Never mind that he called women stuck up and that they were 'probably fat and ugly' because they denied his request. After fighting every urge in my body to respond with the safety off on my mouth others chimed in. Some called him on his post, others agreed. I finally jumped in to give my piece and realized my Gamerchix tag was there. That's when I almost backed out. Then I thought about how I do the same thing whenever it's a religious debate. I always feel like I'm being judged by my religion. The feeling that I'm not a person with an opinion... but a Jew. It's like anything I say will automatically be responded with 'well of course you feel that way'. I took a deep breath and clicked to post. Fuck em if they look at my tag like I'm trying to be exclusive. I'm sick and tired of dancing around other peoples' issues. My opinion is JUST as valid as theirs. They don't like the idea of a 'girls only' club? Start patrolling the online games to stop the harassment. That thread was filled stories that wives/girlfriends/daughters/friends/posters went through. Sexual comments, x-rated pictures, harassing messages. It was insane. No wonder the female gamers got together to create a place they could go to just... play. Two pages later the guy still didn't get it. I don't understand why people think someone HAS to accept their request because they sent it. It's not even about guy VS girl. A lot of male gamers did the same thing. If they didn't recognize the name or play online before they deny it. Why clutter up a friend's list with people you don't know and probably will never play. It's like they're making it a Myspace account for gamers. *rolls eyes* Anyway, I posted and didn't get slammed. Go me!
[keywords: xbl gaming gamerchix] March 11, 2009Twittering AboutYeah so I'm using Twitter now. I'm still trying to get the hang of it. I can do random. I live for random. Random is my life's calling. But I don't know what's too much, if I need more pertinent information or if I need to just post the basics. I can't imagine a bunch of updates telling friends that I'm going to go pee. I could totally do that (and have), but yeah... seems a little on the TMPI side of things. Last night I tried the Left 4 Dead demo. After freaking out about the zombies Jake took over and played it for a while. Because he's so much better with the controller I ended up becoming nauseous from watching him. I was frustrated for a bit but decided that I was going to try again. I am determined to get better. I know that my game play has improved since first buying the console. I practically live off of Fable 2. I would just like to be good enough to join in some online games. Hopefully Jake won't be too annoyed at me playing so I can get better.
[keywords: xbox360 twitter] March 10, 2009I.. Uh... 'Love' You TooSo the hospital operator just told me she loved me. No, really. She always calls my number instead of the Emergency Room (it's my number except two digits are switched). I was on a call when my second line rang. I picked up the phone with my regular greeting and heard, "Oh. Oops. I love you!" and then she hung up. I laughed so hard my original caller thought I was laughing at them. It's silly things like this that make me love my job. The people here are so awesome.
[keywords: Work] March 09, 2009The Watchman cometh......and I watcheth. Friday night was such a blast. First Jake and I met Pattie for dinner. It was good to start going out with friends again as a couple. We sat around talking about everything and got caught up on the latest in our lives. Pattie, who is awesome, was helping out a little girl with Ovarian Cancer through the Make a Wish Foundation. She's always doing such wonderful things. After dinner we headed over to the Arclight Cinema for movie time. The one thing I will never understand is the people who drive out here. It's Friday night and the minute we pull in to park there's a line. Nothing new about that. Meanwhile some moron decides to honk their horn. Fifty billion cars in a line and somehow they think being a major douchebag will get everyone to move. As if that horn will click on a little light and people will go "Oh yeah! We need to move!" and fifty billion open parking spaces will be filled. My only wish is that he's fifty billion and ONE. We met up with some of Jake's friends beforehand and chatted in the entryway. They were all so nice. I watched and smiled while Jake and his friends geeked-out about the movie and everything relating to it. One lady's boyfriend asked me 'are you an avid movie geek or like me?' I told him I was like him, along for the wonderful ride. We laughed and then started our way into the theater. Unfortunately we weren't able to get tickets next to them. Jake and I sat down just as a couple of guys walked by. They looked at the group by us and said some snarky comment about fanboys. Jake make a snarky remark about them and I just sat there... trying to blend into the chair. Watchmen was awesome. Jake was wonderful about the 'don't look' parts. He'd tell me when to look away and when to look again. Yes, I am a total pussy. It's just good to have someone who understands that and supports me on it. *smiles* I never read the graphic novel, although I am curious about it now. I loved the characters, loved the costumes, loved the grittiness of the movie. The movie pace never slowed and each character left me wanting to know a little more. The movie ended and all I could think was, "I cannot WAIT to get this on DVD." This weekend Jake and I spent trying to fight a head cold, so we stayed in doors for the most part. We also found what is going to be the hardest part of our relationship to work on: Who gets to play on the XBox 360. Right now we're both playing Fable 2, which is awesome. He's farther along in the game so I've been getting some great tips. I played with a friend who already beat the game and was able to tell Jake about some awesome extras. We work so well together. :p
[keywords: Movies Friends weekend datenight] March 05, 2009Gnarly, ManRemember all those cool and hip lines you used growing up? Yeah, me neither. Iso started a thread about it and for the life of me I couldn't think of a damn thing. Now all the ridiculous things we used to say keep popping up. Randomness is awesome until you can't explain it. Take "What a Cahwinkidink" for instance (written as it sounds... obviously). It's supposed to be a play on the word 'coincidence'. In high school we were all about being clever. Now that I'm all grown up I realize... we really weren't. I remember our maid asking me where my sister was. I responded with "Beats me". That started off a ten minute discussion on what it meant. In Junior High everything was "rad' or 'radical'. That's rad, man. Of all the clever little sayings I grew up with (being a Valley girl I had a lot of them), the only ones that really stuck are "OMG", "totally" and "like". Thankfully "totally" and "like" are dying out. I use them more around my lamer friend Eileen. :p I haven't gotten to the age where someone has had to explain the new and even hipper terms to me. Kinda dreading that day, actually. You know... because then I'd be old. *shudders*
[keywords: Life childhood old random] March 04, 2009I is a GamerW00000000! Okay, so maybe not in the hardcore sense but still... I've been playing Fable 2 on our XBox 360 and getting pretty darn good at it. I have yet to play online with someone but Halo 3 is itching to be opened. When I first got the 360 I felt like a total outsider. Someone who wanted to fit in but didn't. Now I'm feeling like one of the group of people who play and enjoy it. Part of me wanted to learn it so I could feel more in tune with the world. I was walking into the store and some woman was talking about how when she was a child there were no real video games. I thought to myself, "My G-d. If it weren't for Pong I'd be that woman." I bitched about the games motion making me dizzy and not understanding how the controllers worked. In actuality I hadn't even tried. It was like I was slipping into the age of comfort and not wanting to move forward. Give me my 80s music, memories of cruising down Westwood Blvd. and go play your new fangled games. I'll keep my Atom Ant and Mighty Mouse memories while you talk about some yellow blob in the Pokemon show. I saw that woman and realized I was way too young to be her. On Saturday Jake and I went to Verizon and this woman was being helped beside us. She was in her 70s or 80s and getting a cell phone. She was all dolled up and trying hard to understand how to use it. I could tell she was one sentence away from going back to her rotary phone. I thought about that woman in the store and wondered what age I would choose to stick with. When would I say that it's too hard to learn and I was happy with what I had? Everyone does it to some extent. They find a comfort zone and stick with it. The new and shiny is more work than enjoyment. The latest and greatest doesn't sound that great. The newest band sounds like screeching. The latest movie is like the other five hundred movies before them (and not as good as the classics). The clothes look too trashy. The hairstyle too messy. Too much work. Too much to memorize. Too much to comprehend. I hope it's a long time before I hit the 'too much' stage.
[keywords: Life aging xbox360] March 03, 2009Oh Look... a LungSo Jake ended up having to take a trip to the ER last night. It seems that Friday's move was a little too much for him. After carrying HUGE boxes of books and such around the corner to my car he started coughing. By the time all of his things were tucked away and we were driving home he was coughing pretty hard. REALLY hard. I kept wanting to stop for some water, but my ever stubborn boyfriend nixed the idea. We got home and he still managed to move a lot of the things into the house. No matter what he did the cough didn't get better. On Monday they sent him home from work. By 3pm he was in serious pain and I told him to get over to the ER at my work. I called a doctor who left his name at the front desk. He literally walked in and was escorted to a room. One of the perks of working in a hospital setting. I had to wait until I was done at work to see him, which worked out pretty well. The doctor had just given him the diagnosis (asthmatic Bronchitis) and went to do the sign out. Last night was pretty rough for the both of us. Jake coughed all night long, which kept me awake. He suggested he go sleep on the couch, which I nixed. I'd rather be woken up and make sure he's okay than worry and not sleep. Needless to say I am less than stellar today at work. :p
[keywords: Health jake] March 02, 2009One More Time.... and with FeelingAs some of my friends know, I have been going through a difficult time with Jake. All relationships have them and we're no different. Jake was going through a hard time and had some negative influences to help push him away. He made his choice and left. While I won't go into specifics, in the end it was the best choice. He needed to find himself and I needed that part of me back. The first night was hell. I cried and couldn't sleep. Then I went on his computer to scan a picture and ended up reading some logs between him and an ex friend. Let's just say she was less than kind about me. Those logs cemented my decision. Let him go. I wanted to be a friend. I wanted to stand by him as he found himself. If it happened, great. If not, I move on. My friends swooped in and I had a comfort zone of strength to help me through the tough week. I made goals for myself. I bought my own XBox 360 and starting playing games. At first it was nauseating. The movement always did that to me. I tried playing Duke Nukem and almost puked, much to my one friend's delight. :p Lael came by on the weekend and we spent it buying games and playing them. He was so patient. I popped in Oblivion and had the most agreeable character. Always nodding. I spent more time looking at the ceiling and floor than moving. But then I got better. *grins* I starting meeting some cool people through XBox and I felt like I was getting back to being me again. Then the bastard had to call me asking to come back. :p At first it was not something I was sure I wanted. I love Jake and he's everything to me. But I had finally started to find a peacefulness I missed. He came over and we talked a lot. It would seem him moving away finally gave him the clarity that he needed to see what he wants. After a few more days of talking I held my breath and said yes. We've spent so much time together. Growing close, growing apart and just growing. Now we're together again and hopeful that we'll grow together. This weekend we spent unpacking and messing around on the 360 while doing some house work in between. It was a great weekend to be lazy and just melt into each other. We set some goals on places to go, a budget to adhere to and started calling friends to let them know. Jake's mom gave him an earful, but it was because she was worried sick. Instead of fussing about it Jake smiled. She was glad he was back home and we were working things out. To all of my wonderful friends who stood by me and gave me the support: I cannot thank you enough. I am truly grateful to each one of you. I found strength when I thought I had none. I appreciate the patience you showed me while I rattled off thoughts I needed to work out and advice when I didn't know which direction to go. Ultimately I thank you for giving me the ground back to walk on and standing beside me with whichever direction I chose to go. I love each one of you and feel so lucky to call you a friend. And now... on to bigger and better things. Yay!
[keywords: Life boyfriend jake relationship] |
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