Today was a roller coaster of emotions. It started off with me send the daily hospital census and crossing my fingers. Yesterday I didn't get any feedback, which I took as a good sign. Today I heard the email chime and grimaced. BBB's name was in bold. It was a reply to my email. After taking a few deep breathes I opened it up. Not only was there praise galore (this is a terrific report!), but he CC'd the other BBs outside of my area and asked me to add them to the list to receive the report. After making some sort of bizarre "EEEEEEEEEEEEE!" sound I took a breathe and yelled "Woo Hoo!" Thank goodness I was alone. Then the other emails came in and the calls started. Apparently I'm a hit. This is a good thing and bad, but mostly good. *grins* Say my name, baby... say my name!

Later on in the day I managed to fuck up that positive aura. My boss was standing behind me (she came by to congratulate me on the report) and asked about some rules. I said I'd shoot off an email to my doc and instead of making a NEW email I just hit reply to the last one I sent. It just *happened* to be one saying "Anyway, I am still nervous about the position… even though My Boss says not to be. I have been pulling my hair out about nothing being ready. The bottom line is that it’s a waiting game for the doctors to get their ass in gear". Yeah, so anyway... I shit bricks. We talked briefly as I typed it out, not wanting to be so obvious but knowing she saw the whole thing, and then she left and I panicked. A few hours (and gazillion phone calls to friends) later I called her to explain the context of the email and it was all good. Did I mention I have the most awesome boss in the whole wide world?

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