Caller ID is a good thing. After Jake's latest showdown with his mom he decided on taking a small hiatus from her guilt ridden drama routine. I love her to death but the woman feeds off of misery. Her latest stint of once again taking in Jake's dead ex friend's wife who's also a druggie and ran off with her now dead husband's brother *deep breath* with the two infants in tow was just too much. She's like a two year old. You tell her not to pick something up and she dives for it... then cries when it hurts her. Unfortunately this isn't the first time she's taken them in. Some call it southern hospitality, I call it attention whore.

This morning the phone rang and I picked it up. After seeing his mom's name on it I waved it in front of Jake. "You want to talk to her?" After shaking his head I placed it back in the cradle. After the answering machine lied announced our unavailability we heard the sweet voice of his mom. Hah! More like her 'how much can I tell you how pissed I am that you didnt pick up without saying it' voice. After stumbling through her message, obviously pissed at him for not picking up she said she mailed his V-Day card (which is weird) and then hung up. Yes, his mother sends him a Valentine Day card. *blink* Anyway, we giggled about being so sneaky which is totally childish and totally us. She threatened said she was going to call tomorrow so I'll leave the choice up to him. No way am I answering the phone with raging mom on the other end. I may be blonde, but I'm not stupid.

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To clarify, I *didn't ask* for a Valentine's Day card, nor is her sending me a card some customary thing. I might be from the South, but there's no incest here.

And if there was, I'd be more willing to bone my uncle than her.

It's just some wild hair up her ass kind of thing that she can use to a) contact me or b) try and guilt me into something.

Now excuse me while I go throw up thanks to the mental picture of me fucking my uncle.

The sheer imagry! Astounding! I feel for you Jake, really I do.

Isn't dealing with family, and (soon to be?) inlaws, just a riot. :) I could write a book about my family, call it something like, "Adventures with Crazy People".

Although, Jake, I would personally avoid images of me banging your uncle. Not good for the mental health, Ugh.

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