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« April 2005 | Main | June 2005 » May 31, 2005*Sings Along*I've been having a ball with my new Music section. I spent my long weekend adding the album/artist art and websites to my playlist. The next thing I need to do is add the lyrics, but I'm taking my time on that one. :bane: really out did himself this time. My music just got fun to listen to!
[keywords: Music Bane praising_bane] May 26, 2005That's Karma, Baby!Everyday I see some good in my life. Good deeds, kind words, common courtesy. And every time I see this phenomena, the same thing happens... Absolutely fucking nothing. A man opens the door and the woman walks in. Does she say thank you? G-d forbid. Honey, Women's lib is a bunch of crap. Another good idea gone astray by Fembots from hell. Equal rights? I'm all for em. But what the hell does a man opening a door for a woman have to do with equal rights? I've held the door open for both genders. It's respect. Did I save them from some unholy task of opening the door themselves? Would they be stranded outside if I hadn't? No. What's in it for me? Nothing. That's right boys and girls, I actually did something for nothing. Or... did the smile on their face give me something back? I'm talking about Karma. I believe in that force more than I believe in the boogieman. When you do something bad.. Sometimes it slaps you right back. But sometimes, sometimes it waits. While other people may see it as a sign of luck, I know better. Because karma accumulates. When that sucker finally comes around, it'll bitch-slap you into oblivion. I don't want to be anywhere near when that force explodes. I've seen it happen too many times. Just think happy thoughts and don't let the assholes get to you.
[keywords: Society karma] May 21, 2005Magically Del.icio.usLately I've been playing around with different geeky things on the web. When :bane: first told me about Del.icio.us I thumbed my nose to it. I thought it was just double work for my bookmarks. Then one day I decided to reorginize my bookmarks. Talk about a nightmare. I am a total packrat and saving links is no exception. I had over 1600 links to go through, and over half of them ended up being dead links. Del.icio.us started looking real good to me about a third of the way through. Instead of searching through folder after folder to guess where I put a link I am able to click on my Del.icio.us page and search through terms. For instance: When I bookmarked iLL WiLL PreSS I used the terms "flash funny humor animation". That way I can find it by selecting anyone of those or a combination. It also shows how many other people linked that site. I have only linked about 410 of my bookmarks. Some of the ones I left off are just silly sites I'll probably go through and delete the next time I get a wild hair up my ass. Oh yeah, and I left off some of my porn links. I'm selfish. Deal with it. :P
[keywords: Bane cyberculture Del.icio.us bookmarks] May 17, 2005Hey Hey The Gangs All Here... SortaMy friend arrived from Arizona today. I haven't seen him in a couple of years so it's a great to be able to kick back and chat. It's also a great excuse for me to take a couple of days off and relax after being bombarded at work. The first order of business was to have some Tequila shots. Then he tackled our router problem. I finally get to annoy the neighbors. Go me!
[keywords: Friends vacation tequila] May 14, 2005*Puts On White Glove*It's spring cleaning time at the Diva/JakeD home! It's amazing what a little bit of bleach will Anyway... There are two types of cleanliness. One where people can 'pop by' and eat of of the floor and then there's my kind. I need a day to walk around fretting about how it needs to be clean when in the end it's a matter of hanging up clothes and putting bills away. Having two cats means that I need a hairball check and a vaccuum to wisk away any kitter litter that they dragged out from their box. Jake decided to steam clean the couch for good measure. Now if I can just keep everything clean til Tuesday...
[keywords: spring-cleaning] May 12, 2005Hold Up Your Right Arm, Left Leg and SquintI found a site with 3D Stereograms and decided to see if my luck has changed. Nope. I have never been able to find the second picture in one of those things. They used to come in the Sunday paper... in the kids section. I remember sitting at work and having my coworker 'coach' me on what to do. "Sit still, focus til your eyes whater and move the picture slowly towards you." After two minutes of this I hear someone clear their throat. Some doctors were standing there, waiting to give me a case to enter. I put down the paper and apologize only to see them holding back laughter. Finally one of them points to my nose. Aparently the newspaper ink had rubbed off onto it. I felt like such an ass. Needless to say, that's the last time I tried that little trick.
[keywords: 3D-Stereograms] May 11, 2005Picket Fences *snickers*Women are always complaining about their partners' sexual habits. Whine, whine whine. When I ask "Why are you telling me this? Why don't you tell him?" They respond with shock and horror riddin face. "I can't talk to him about THAT!" Give me a break. You can tell a group of people your sexual likes and dislikes, but you can't approach the guy who's fucking you? It's hard to look a guy in the eyes without smirking when you've heard him described as 'the fence painter'. One nod and it's all over. If you can't be open about what you want and don't want with your partner sexually then lay down, spread your legs and let him enjoy himself. Pull out the vibrator and take care of yourself later.
[keywords: sex] May 09, 2005TV is the DevilI find it so ironic that our right wingers feel television shows need to be censured because they can morally corrupt our minds. Then "reality" shows start popping up on every channel, and I don't hear a peep about their content. Throwing married couples on an island with temptation, locking people up in a house together, and then there's the bane of my existence: Survivor. I have yet to watch an episode. It has no appeal to me whatsoever.The idea of plotting against one another for money seems barbaric to me. Is this something we really want to teach our youth and frighteningly impressionable society twits? "Schemers Always Win" should be the true name of that show. The idea in itself will never be proven. These numbskulls are playing for money. They're not trying to survive, they're in it for the cash. Any way you look at it, greed vs preservation are complete polar opposites. Sorry guys, your show doesn't cut it. Buh bye. If it were only that easy. There are people who just lap this shit up. You want to worry about the end of civilization? Why don't you get your panties in a wad about these shows? I know they're going to find... "and the fifth seal was broken... and Survivor was unleashed upon the world" in the Apocalypse section of the bible. Y'all better leave my Internet porn alone and go after the real moral corruption. And what the hell was the pig killing episode for? Arrggh!!
[keywords: reality-shows television] May 06, 2005Har de Har HarIsn't it funny how friendships teeter on the edge of mortal enemies? When a stranger falls, you ask if they're okay... offer to help. Your friend? Laugh and point. Then tell everyone. When they say, "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer..." It's not so you can keep an eye on them... It's so you can hurl them at your friends.
[keywords: Friends] May 04, 2005Remember When Poo Was A Bad Thing?Let's talk about scat. That's right, scat. No, I'm not shooing my cats, and I don't mean Ella Fitzgerald, either. I'm talking Poo. Not Winnie. Feces. Stool. Doo doo. Number 2. You get the idea? All I want to know is why? I mean, everyone enjoys the satisfaction of taking a dump. That feeling of relief. And for women, the idea that you just dropped a pound and can now eat that Ho Ho is always a plus. Everyone loves sharing eachother's happiness, but this is going a bit too far. I'm happy that you're happy. Really. You don't have to take a crap on me to prove it. What do these people do during the day? It makes you think twice before shaking someone's hand. And what do they eat for lunch? Brown bagging it brings on a whole new meaning. At least no one will snag their meal. I'd rip out a kidney before going over to one of their dinners. There is no physical sexual stimuli involved here. These numbskulls are just warped. They're also the driving force behind the left wing's "moralistic" witch hunt to shut down porn. Beastiality, scat and childporn, oh my! The new Wiz. And speaking of wizzing... No no... another time.
[keywords: scat poo fetishes] May 02, 2005It's OverThis has been one of the hardest days I've worked. One by one, eight people were led into their supervisor's office and laid off. Five of them were friends of mine. I feel lost right now. Even though we were warned about the layoffs months ago it still is a shock. My coworker spent the first part of the morning making comments like "Wow. Made it to first break." and "Gee... Lunchtime and I'm still here." I wanted to smack her. It didn't hit me until I turned and she was gone that I realized how right she was. My friends are coming around and I don't know what to say. It's worse than a death. At least then you can console them, say that the person is in a better place, that the pain is over. Now all I can think of saying is clichés that always annoyed the fuck out of me.
[keywords: Work layoffs stress] May 01, 2005Spare A Paperclip, Bub?It's hard for everyone when a business decides to do layoffs. Everyone goes through a whole gamut of emotions. Sad, angry, happy (that it's not them) and guilt. Right now I'm a little bit of everything (a talent from the Jew in me). I feel bad that my coworker is going, but a part of me want's her to leave already. Once she found out that she was definately being laid off she started being impossible to deal with. Everything that you ask her turns into the injustice of the company. Me: Do you have any paperclips I can have? Yesterday she crossed the line. She came in to my cubicle to whine/cry/rage about being laid off and started talking about how unfair our system was. "Why is it that someone gets to stay based solely on their years of service (me) while someone who has been a hard worker and fast learner gets laid off because she hasn't been here a while (her)?" WTF!?! What makes her think that she's better than me because she can make a fucking graph faster? Mind you, she's slow as shit after eating refried beans when it comes to any of our daily duties. She 'forgot' to do a report needed every 3 months for a whole year. Guess who had to do it... Yeppers, yours truly. Now I know why they don't give any prior warning to people. I figure she's going to do dick as far as duties are concerned for the next week. She'll be too busy sending out resumes (fine by me) and bitching at me about how she should have been the one they kept (blow me). < /bitch fit>
[keywords: Work layoffs stress drama coworkers ex-coworker] |
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